


Going Topside

by herima



Category: Fallout (Video Games), Fallout 3
Genre: Angst, DLC, F/F, F/M, Growing Up, Life before the storm, Multi, Neurodiversity, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Will put TW on chapters notes, rating will change later, vault life
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-06
Updated: 2021-02-26
Packaged: 2021-03-07 21:41:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Underage
Chapters: 11
Words: 37,919
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26864554
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/herima/pseuds/herima
Summary: Ariel Ibriham has always been sure of what she wanted from life. To be a scientist and change the life of the Vault forever. But there was always been a calling to her, that maybe they could take life in the Vault to the topside. And change life for the Vault. Though after a rude awakening she realizes there's more to life than the Vault. Going topside was the best thing that could've happened to her- though it'll take some time before she can process that as a reality.
Relationships: Brief Amata Almodovar/Female Lone Wanderer, Butch DeLoria/Female Lone Wanderer
Comments: 7
Kudos: 7





	1. new student

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi, if youre coming from my JKS story in FNV ive been taking the time to really get the next chapters right since i really want to get a story right and not just have my stories feel like filler until it gets the romance or whatever. I want it to be a story. SO Im now going to be working on (while still doing JKS) the story of my OC of the Lone Wanderer Ariel Ibriham! And I wanna convey a story and explore with characters and stuff that I find myself struggling to do. I always wished there was more we couldve explored in the vault when it came to characters and reading. (i rlly rlly like reading and talking to ppl in fallout lol theres always something to find.

“Why does she have that white stuff in her hair?” 

“Maybe she used dye.” 

“We’re not allowed to dye our hair though?—“ 

“Well maybe she’s a rebel. Goes against the rules.” 

“Nah. Maybe she’s a freak, I mean look at her eyes.” 

She could hear the multiple whispers as she sat down in Mrs. Lannisters class for the incoming first graders. Mrs. Lannister didn’t seem to care for the whispers and continued on with the lesson, so she tried to as well. Tried to ignore the hard stares and murmurs about her. They didn’t like the stares but Daddy did say people wouldn’t be used to someone different. Said that once she started school it wouldn’t just be her and him anymore. She’d **have** to communicate with others and socialize. It both excited her and frightened her but she wanted friends- she’d **like** some friends. 

At lunch she looked around Lunchroom B and wondered who would like to sit with her. Looking around the room she spotted a few boys roughhousing, some girls chatting it up, and some boy sitting alone for some reason. She decided maybe she should sit alone and did exactly that, eating the lunch Dad packed up lovingly for her when she was approached. 

“Hey, uh, who’re you? I've never seen you in the playground before.”

“I don't like the playground.” She said it simply and the boy just nodded his head. 

“Well uh, my name is Paul er.. Paul Hannon.. What's your name?” The boy kept looking over her shoulder and she was too distracted to look as well. 

“I’m Ariel-uh-uhm Ibriham.” Ariel murmurs her name with a stutter, and Paul then realizes he's seen her before. When her mother was getting a check-up while pregnant with his baby sister he remembers seeing the girl. Remembers her hiding upon making eye contact with Paul. Said boy smiles and points at the table behind him.

“Oh, I remember you, Ariela. Butch wanted me to come over and find out what your name was. Anyways, I’ll see you later Ariela.” _Butch?_

Shyly she turned her head towards the table a few seats behind her and made eye contact with a boy. Blue eyed and brown haired. Hair curly like that little girl Shirley Temple. But then he broke eye contact and growled something to his friends that were laughing at him a little. Peculiar. 

Just when she was about to look away someone had come up to her as well.

“Hi, I’m Amata.”

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


First grade wasn’t so bad. Classes were super easy compared to what her and Dad worked on together in his free time when he’d teach her about so many different things. Everytime she thought she’d known everything he did, there he’d go again teaching her something new. 

“What’s that?” The boy pointed out as Butch had approached her, pointing at the white streak in her hair by her ear. “Did you use the dye from Benny’s salon to do that?” 

“Do what?” Ariela instinctively leaned away from his hand that went to touch her hair. 

“The _color_ **dingbat** , did you make it that color or were you born a freak like Freddie?” Ariela frowned deeply at that. Daddy said to never take anything from anybody when it was disrespect or unwanted touch. She wasn’t a.. Dingbat! But she was also told to never start fights, only to finish them so she brushed off the name calling and huffed air outta her mouth anxiously. 

“It’s called.. Poliosis Butch, a-and Freddie’s not a freak Butch. Be nice!” Oops. Standing up for others was an instinct and the snapback was not a good taste in Butch’s mouth. 

“Be nice? Who the hell do you--” 

“Ariela? It’s time to go home sweetheart.” James had come to pick her up finally from class saving her from a possible altercation when it was just her first week in school. 

“Go on run to your Daddy.” Butch grumbled under his breath as she walked off hand in hand with her Dad excited to go home. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


“Daddy?” 

“Yes dear?” James was in the kitchen making dinner since he’d finally gotten an assistant for his work, meaning more time for Alita. 

“Look! Doesn’t that look like Butch?” He came out of the kitchen to take a peek at the television playing an old tape. 

“Hm.. Yes actually,” James laughed bringing her plate over to give her, and sat down chuckling as she jumped straight into his lap. “He has her curls, but so do you sweetheart.” Ariela hummed in thought before shaking her head. “No, Shirly has one eye color. Mine look different. So does my hair” 

“God couldn’t decide whose eyes to give you and gave you both.” Ariela smiled goofily as he gave her a pinch on the nose, “He did give you your mothers face.” 

“What did mommy look like?” James forgot he only had one photo of her, they’d left in a rush. And photos of each other had been an afterthought. Thought there'd be new memories and photos to take together later in the Vault but she-- 

“She was.. Beautiful your mother. I don’t know how else to describe her. But you look like her so much. So, bright like her.” James brushed her mane out of the way and booped her nose. “I know you’re just distracting Daddy from having to eat your protein but its not going to work.”

“Bleh! But Daddy- The steak is _nas~ty_.” 

“Eat your protein honey.”

"Yes Daddy." As she ate her dinner she thought of the Shirley Templed boy and Freddie the "Freak". 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is short but just an intro to this! i may go further in depth of Ariel by actually drawing her for a visual since I find myself getting interested in art again during this quarantine. Nonetheless I enjoyed this and hope you enjoyed this short intro as well :)


	2. big 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> gonna b honest yes.. yes i did go thru a whole list of vault members and then added my own to make it feel more like a vault. indeed i did. There’s no way there’s only that many people in a vault! Especially if it’s been around for years. No way it doesn’t have levels to it and different rooms etc etc. I’m hoping to expand on a lot of things i learned after searching things up about these characters and yeah- i hope y enjoy what i do with the information that is given in lore and my own lore added to canon.

**_“Happy Birthday!~”_ ** Everyone had said with kind smiles on their faces. It was just what Ariel wanted. Not a lot of people. Just the people she liked and those that liked her as well. But she didn't expect it _really._ She thought it would be another birthday just her and Daddy. Not that she was complaining of course. 

Officer Gomez saw the way her eyes blinked rapidly upon the fluorescent lights being turned on so quickly. “Stanley you turned the lights on too fast! You blinded the poor kid!” He said with a soft laugh as Freddie gave her a shy wave from behind his father. 

“You’re already ten, my God..” James was smiling gratefully and also a little amused since he realized she was playing makeup with Amata before this and had allowed Amata to peach her cheeks almost matching Amata’s, but her Father had made her wipe the makeup off before hand saying she looked ridiculous. She kept the blush on though since the blue eyeshadow couldn't stay. 

“If only your mother…” 

The Overseer had made his way over abruptly interrupting her Father and had brought out her standard issued PipBoy everyone had gotten before her last year. Ariela was enamored and excited to finally have a PipBoy of her own no longer left out of conversations about their new handheld devices. “You’re now the big one-zero. And it is about time you got your own PipBoy-” Ariela kinda nodded off after that kinda just waiting for him to hand it to her as she looked around the room and then she spotted him. Turned around in the diners booth seats staring at her. But Paul Hannon was there as well and she found herself giving him a small wave. Paul was alright in her books. They didn’t play together a lot but he shared with her and didn’t ever mind being around her. She'd almost waved at **him** but he turned away just as quickly after sticking his tongue out at her, so she did the most mature thing and stuck her tongue out as well. 

“Be nice Ariel.” Came James and she huffed in annoyance. 

_Why would he invite Butch?! He gave me noogies the other day and messed up my braids!_

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


“Why hello! Happy Birthday dearie. Ten already. I remember when you and your Father first came….” The woman seemed to catch herself in her ramblings and Areila was too caught up in the high of being the birthday girl to realize what Grandma Palmer had intended by her words. “Oh listen to me ramble! You’re waiting for your gift aren’t you?” Ariela nodded her head, “Yes ma’am.” 

“How kind sweetheart. A lot of children ought to look up to you on how to be respectful. Here you are Ariela, James told me how much you loved my sweet rolls.” Ariela was so excited she almost ate it right in front of Grandma Palmer- and she really did just that. Half had already been scarfed down by the time Amata had come over to talk to her. 

“Wow, you really like her sweet rolls huh?” Amata teased giving her friend a little poke. 

“So, what’d’ya think of the decorations? Yours truly did it!” She smiled as she motioned Freddie over. “Freddie made the cute cutouts.”

“Really? I love dogs, wish we had them down here” Ariela gave Freddie a kind hug after waiting for his response to it. Knowing he didn’t enjoy touching just like her. “Heh. Yeah me too! Uh, so I made this for you. I hope you like it.” Freddie took out a metal dog made out of the bendy metal material Stanley had plenty of lying around. Stuffing it in her pocket with a smile she laughed at how cute it looked. “I love it Fred.” 

“Hey don’t forget about me!” Amata pulled out her present and showed it to her, a comic! It was the next volume she’d looked everywhere in the Vaults library for. “Grognak the Barbarian! I know you’ve been looking everywhere in the library for it--”

“Where’d you find it?”

“It was stuck to the back of a book in the history section. Somebody either hid it or clearly don’t know the difference between history and comics.” They all laughed at that. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


As Ariela was walking over to Stanley to thank him for fixing up her PipBoy she was stopped by Paul Hannon. “Hey uh, Happy Birthday and everything.” Ariela smiled a little awkwardly since she could feel Butch and Wally staring at her as Paul spoke to her. 

“I know Butch and I give you a hard time, but you know I don’t really mean it.. Right?” Ariela realized he might be apologizing but she couldn’t tell since Wally was snickering right next to Paul. So she just shrugged. “I dunno Paul..” shrugged shrinking under Butch’s look when she noticed him scowling at her or maybe it was Paul. She couldn’t tell. “W-Well I’m uh sorry. Thank you for inviting me Ariela.” He’d finally been straight forward to her and she smiled sweetly liking that he wanted to apologize to her. “Thanks Paul. You’re real sweet.” He smiled at that and watched as she walked off to talk to Stanley before gasping as Butch put him in an armlock for no reason.

“Ow, Ow, Ow! Butch what was **that** for?” 

“Ha, Ha! Looks like Paul’s got a girlfriend gross!” _Poor Paul._

Stanley looked like he was in pain, clutching at his head as he sat at the bar across from the Robot. “You okay Stanley?” 

“Yeah! Yeah. I’m alright kid. How’s that PipBoy3000 treating ya? I know people may not prefer that model, but I like it and it's quite reliable and sturdy. I hope it treats you well kid.” Ariela nodded her head. “I really like it Stanley, thank you so much.” He went to give her a pat on the head and she leaned back to avoid it, “Ah right sorry, but I’m glad you like it. I got you something else as well. A nice baseball cap! I’ve seen your throwing kid. You got an arm on you.” Stanley said handing it to her and placing it on her head. It fit well since she had her hair back in a low ponytail. 

As they’d finished their exchange Andy the Robot had gone to cut the cake and ruined it, and Ariela was disappointed for the others more than anything since she still had the half of her sweetroll to be eaten. As she went to walk off to her Father about the cake situation Butch had cut her off and stopped her from going off. “I’m hungry and that stupid robot destroyed the cake! Gimme that sweet roll you got from Old Lady Palmer. I know she gave you a sweet roll, she gives everyone a sweetroll for their birthday.” Ariela stood her ground despite the fear of being punched or having her hair pulled on by Wally and Butch were in her stomach. 

“I- I already ate half so if you want the other one you could have it if you say please..” Butch stood up, their eyes level with each other though she had more height on him than anything. “What’d you say to me nosebleed?” 

_My nose bled_ **_once_ ** _during class and now I’m forever the nose bleed?!_

“You know what soak your head Butch. M’not giving you my sweetroll.” Ariela was just about to walk off when he yanked on her hair. She’d been in enough fights with him to know where it hurt and kicked him right in the gut to get him off her. But before she could punch him in the face Officer Gomez stepped in. 

“Butch! What are you doing, and trying to hit a girl no less!” Gomez pulled his hand out of her hair quickly and separated them, tempted to send Butch home to his Mother for his terrible behavior. 

Ariel frowned deeply while rubbing the burn after his aggressive pull away as she walked off, noticing her Father speaking on the intercom. Amata and Freddie had come over to Ariela to console her, “Hey don’t uhm.. Maybe don’t let Butch get you down he’s a jerk. O-Or whatever you wanna do- I think you’re alright Ariela.” 

“You too Fred. You’re nice--” Amata had made a little face at that and was gonna tell her about cooties that were contagious when James had stepped in. “That was Jonas on the intercoms. Come.” After she stepped away from her friends she bubbled up with excitement as he told her there was a surprise for her on the reactor level. “Really? Do you think it's okay to go?” She asks looking behind her to see Butch already looking her way, out of instinct she gave the dazed boy her tongue and that snapped him out of it quick as she turned back to her Father who assured her. “No dear, I think its alright if you slip away for a few minutes. Go on down first, I'll meet you there.” 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


On her way out she spotted Beatrice who she remembered had baby fever like it was no other, and even tried to convince Ariel when she was a child to call her Mama but James snipped it in the ass quickly and told her she shouldn't do that to Ariel. “Hi Ms. Armstrong,” 

“Why hello there dearie! Ten already, look at you. I remember when I was helping your Father change your diapers.” _Ugh. I’m not a baby!_

“Hehe. Yes, Ms. Armstrong.” Beatrice heaved a soft calm breath as she took out a paper for Ariel.

_Probably another one of her poems. Always so.. Depressing._

“Thank you so much Ms. Armstrong, your poems are.. Nice..” With that she slipped away and headed down toward the reactor level after sneaking past one of the old security guards and said hello to one of her upperclassmen Joseph. 

“Hey kid. Whatcha up to?” Ariel didn’t mean to snap but she was sick of being called a kid when she was sure her upperclassmen didn't even know what a tesla coil was.

“M’ **not** a kid.” Joseph snorted, “Right, so what'd ya doing over here young lady? Ain’t it your birthday?” He decided to walk with her even though he was on his way to go ‘study’ with Vanessa. “Yeah! I’m ten now. My Daddy said he has a surprise for me so I’m headed there right now.” Joseph looked around to see if there was any security and took out a cigarette to smoke. “Sounds nice. Dad loves you huh?” Joseph smiled when she did. Joseph lowkey looked to James as a bit of an inspiration when it came to the way he was with kids. Especially his own. Joseph knew he wanted to be a good Dad like James. “How’s Vanessa?” She asks as they turn the corner. Ariela was leading the way. 

“She’s good. M’thinkin’ about marrying her--” Ariela gasped, “Joey!” He looked down at her confused and waited for her to elaborate.

“But what about _cooties!_ ” She yelped the last part and he barked a laugh out at that, having to put a hand on his chest to steady himself from the humor in it all. 

“Cooties? Jeez. I ain’t used that word since middle school.” He laughed again and flung his cigarette into a garbage can after he realized what the hell he was doing in front of the girl. It wasn’t kind.

“Yeah joey. Cooties! If you’re not careful Daddy says you’ll get sick and blow up with big sores all over and-” He cut off her ramblings, “Yeah, yeah. I heard it all before. But you become immune to cooties when you decide you are.” Ariel didn’t really interpret what he said and shrugged.

“Is that boy still botherin’ you? Do I gotta beat anybody up?” He joked and Ariel giggled. “Y-Yeah, but! I took care of him. He’s smaller than me so it’s easier to just push him away.” Joey nodded his head. “Right, well you tell me if he hurts you bad okay? This is my stop.” He says pointing at Vanessa’s quarters. 

“Oh Vanessa?” He nodded his head giving the doorbell a ring. Vanessa quickly opened the door and smiled brightly upon seeing Joey and pulled him in for a hug and a kiss on the cheek. “Hey babe. You look beautiful.” She pushed him on the shoulder playfully and finally noticed Ariela. 

“Hey Ariela, You look so pretty all dolled up.” Vanessa noticed the blush and gave her a wink. “Get dolled up for your birthday?” 

“Mhm. I gotta get going though, can’t stay and chat.” She huffed a laugh through her nose finding the mature words coming out of a ten year olds mouth hilarious. 

“Well alright. We’ll see you later Ariela!” Vanessa then remembered and told the girl to wait as she ran into her quarters for something.

“I remember you said you wanted a doll. Look! It’s lightly used, but she’s pretty just like you even gave her the hair color you got on the sides of your head.” Ariela wasn’t into dolls anymore, but she liked that Vanessa remembered what she’d said months ago.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Finally in the reactor she found Jonas down there with his arms crossed upon seeing her. “What’re you doing down here young lady?” Jonas had slid his glasses down the slope of his nose and had given her that look he’d give to kids if they were misbehaving. But she had a baby crush on Jonas and shyly blushed holding her new doll in her hands. “O-Oh well.. Uhm, Daddy said I could be down here, s-sorry I--”

“It's alright Ariel, I'm only messing with you dear. You’ve hit the double digits! And your father and I were thinking you were ready for something bigger than a doll or play toys. But-- Oh! I think I hear someone coming down here.” Looking behind her she saw her Dad with her present in hand. A BB gun. With a huge gasp of delight she reached out for it and went to grab it. “A BB gun?!” She yelled excitedly and he shushed her quietly, nervously looking behind him in case a guard was passing by. “Indeed my love, why don’t you give it a try? I set up a shooting range for you down here- And be sure to thank Jonas as well. He found the old thing and fixed it for you.” 

“Thank you Jonas you’re the best!” she says giving him a hug after she’d given her Father one. “No problem kiddo. Now why don’t you go and show me how it’s done huh?” 

After have a few shots off and hit the bullseyes, James asked for a photo but a Radroach had come out of nowhere and Ariela instinctively went to shoot him but realized it was just living its life like she was, but James had told her to take it out so she did just that and killed it.

“Alright! Now let's take that photo, Ariel.” Jonas brought the camera up to his face and smiled happily at the two before getting the flash ready. 

“Smile!” 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Ariela had finished her school break homework already, and was bored as she sat at her desk now doing the homework Jonas would assign to her to keep her mind going and not turn lazy as he said it would be if she didn’t keep her brain stimulated. She believed Jonas of course though since she wanted to be smart like him and her Dad. Ariel knew Amata was most likely sleeping at this time since it was now considered night at the moment as she looked to the dialogue clock that read **10:29pm.** She decided she’d just see if her Dad was staying up late in his office again and snuck over as best as she could before anybody could see her.

Ariela was twelve now. So, there were things she understood now as life went on. She thought maybe her and Butch would be on acquantice terms but it seemed they truly could never be friends at this point. He always pulled her hair when he was behind her, pushed her randomly, would steal her pencils, and just be the biggest nuisance ever and would succeed so well at it she thought the Overseer would personally make that a job just for Butch. 

Now turning the corner to see what her Dad was up to she heard sniffling in his office and immediately went to see if it was him crying and was absolutely shell-shocked when she realized who it was. 

“It’s alright son.. You’re gonna be okay.” Butch sniffled again and wiped at his eyes with the back of his hand as James placed a bandage over the minor cut on his forehead and lip. 

“I just..” He was hiccuping like crazy and it was driving him to anger more than anything that he couldn’t be strong. That he cried like a baby and couldn’t stop his Father from smacking his Mother into the next day. 

“I d-don’t wanna talk about it.” He sounded angry now and she puffed her cheeks up with air as he snapped at her Dad. Just when she’d felt a little for him. He’s just a jerk. Even when he’s crying. 

“Ariel?” He called out for his daughter knowing damn well she was hiding by his office door. He spotted her as soon as she walked through the main entrance of it. 

“H-Hi Daddy. M’sorry for sneaking out. I’m just so bored and-” James waved his hand in front of Butch and watched as the boy flinched at the simple wave of a hand and took close note of that. 

“It’s okay dear. Would you mind if Butch stayed the night? His mother already gave the okay and I’d hate for him to be alone in the living room.” Ariel hid the frown on her face and just nodded. James was mentally telling her to say ‘yes’ and that usually meant that it would be a big help if she did so.. She did. “Yes. It’s okay.” Ariela didn’t see the blush on Butch’s cheeks but James did.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Ariela knew he wouldn’t have the audacity to bully her in her own home, but she did feel a little uncomfortable since this was her space. The no Butch, no cootie filled boys, or bratty girls space. Just Ariela and her with her thoughts or gadgets and now he was in it. She feared he’d make fun of her for her decorations, or the little stacks of scrap metal on her desk that she had hooked up to the conductor she was trying to get working for her own personal experiment.

“D-Don’t touch anything on my desk.” She didn’t wanna hear him complain about getting electrocuted. 

“ _Okay_.” It was the softest he’d ever heard him speak to her, and as she set out the makeshift mattress on the floor for herself since her Dad said to let him sleep in her bed just for this one night. Just a simple ‘Okay’ made her a little confused and skeptical if this was the same Butch she knew. The Butch that bullied her and name-called her if she ignored his hair pulling- Ariela decided to tread light and just get him to go to sleep since thats what her Dad wanted, but then he softly started crying again as she motioned for him to lay down in her bed. 

“I’ll be down here--” He softly went to hold her wrist and the way she flinched like he was gonna hit her made him sniffle the tears away. “I-I won’t hit you I swear- I.. I’m just.. Just a little scared.” 

_Butch? Scared? What kinda sick joke?_

“Scared?... Butch it’s just me and my Dad across the hall.” She whispers using her sleepwears long sleeve to wipe his cheek gently. Ariel hated the sight of tears on anybody.

“I-I know but- Just lay up here with me.. Please?” Ariel huffed a frustrated sigh as she laid next to him in the bed. “Alright fine. Just don’t-”

“I won’t touch you I swear.” He beat her to it as he followed her in a lying position as well. And almost just about yelled at himself as streams of hot tears fell down his cheeks again. 

“What happened Butch?” Ariel’s voice was so caring, like she cared about what he had to say and the attention quite frankly overstimulated him. The wiping of his cheeks again and her words. God- Why was he such a jerk- Why couldn’t he be nice- Why couldn’t he be like Paul or Freddie, she liked them. Tolerated Paul but he remembered what she called him at her birthday party a few years ago. Called him **_sweet_ **. All he ever got called was a jerk, asswipe, cootie man, bitch instead of Butch. You name it. It was gonna be a long time before he realized the name calling on her part wasn’t uncalled for like hers was.

“My uh.. My Father he- he got mad and.. Hit me a few times.. Not before he hit my Ma.” he choked up at the last part and cleared his throat. She knew his voice was going through changes at thirteen so she didn’t make fun of him for the voice crack. 

Ariel gave him a close lipped smile as she kept her thumbs below the corners of his eyes in hopes they’d stop pouring out. 

“Its alright Butch.. You’re safe with me.” Her words rang around in his head after that, echoing straight to his heart. 

“Y-You never told me why you have those white streaks in your hair,” he was tempted to touch them since they were cutely curled naturally, framing her face perfectly. 

“I did.. But you called me a dingbat..” He blushed at the realization and was quick to apologize. Ariel liked this Butch. This Butch was nice. Easy to talk to. And wasn’t short fused with her.

“Sorry-” he yawned afterwards, all tuckered out from the night.

“Let’s just try and get some sleep..” 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


The morning after Butch had went home after eating breakfast with the Ibriham family. Ariel felt a little sad to see him go. That he may never be nice like he was again after that day. 

“You know.. If you ever feel sad again you can come here Butch. We can play or something.” James smiled seeing that there could possibly be a re-building of friendship between them. 

“Okay Ari.” Butch smiled wholesomely with a head nod and gave her a wave as he walked off with James.

Butch turned back a few times to see if she was still looking at him. Even as he rounded the corner they caught each other still looking.

He wrote about it in his journal- The one James said he should start writing in. To help him with his emotions and the way home life made him feel. But all he wrote about on the first page was a little plan of how he’d get her to be his friend. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Once she’d finally finished her makeup Vanessa took a look at it. “Hm.. How about you let me do some finishing touches?” Joseph took a look and almost laughed but she’d elbowed him before he could. 

“You look nice Ari, but I’m gonna make it even better!” She says as Joey sat comfortably on Vanessa’s bed. They were gonna be a chaperone that watched the kids tonight so it made sense she was in here with them. She liked Joe and Vanessa. They were in 10th grade when she met them. Joseph was her tutor for english- she always struggled with english literature, so James got her a tutor and well the rest was history. Ever since they’d just been like a big brother and sister to her. Plus they didn’t make fun of her or bring up her genetic mutations so she liked them for that as well. 

“Remember our eighth grade dance Joey? I remember when you accidentally spilled punch on me and I slapped you cause-” Vanessa giggled as she remembered the scene and quickly bit her tongue knowing Ariel didn’t like hearing about kissy-kissy cootie stuff, “He gave me a flower as an apology. I still have it.” 

“A flower and you.. Forgave him?” Ariel questioned as she was now finishing the last curl in her hair to a bouffant hairstyle with her signature hairs framing her face and fresh cut bangs Vanessa had done for her since she was aspiring to be the best hairdresser in the world.

  
  


“Well, he did something else but I’m sure you wouldn’t wanna hear about us cootie lovers.” Ariel nodded her head in agreement.

“Thought so.” Once she was done Joey nodded his head. “Beautiful, you did great Van.” He compliments her and Ariel. 

“Knock em’ dead kid. You look just like Pamela Tiffin in ‘The Lively Set.’” 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Ariela was late to the dance and upon entering hoped nobody noticed her entering, but it was kinda hard to go unnoticed when Joey announced himself to the upperclassmen who were there as chaperones to watch the younger kids. So, after he and Vanessa had gone over to their own friends she was behind them, hands folded together as she walked in. People didn’t seem to stare long so she was glad for that and watched as everyone else continued playing tag and running around the gymnasium like usual young teens did. 

Freddie greeted her first along with Amata, they must’ve been together when they’d seen her. She was grateful for that. “Hey! You look awesome,” compliments Amata and Ariela smiles brightly, “Thanks! Vanessa and Joey help me.” Freddie and Amata looked at each other like they’d heard the craziest thing. Ariela being friends with upperclassmen. Seniors no less! That was seen as cool as hell to be friends with older kids. 

“You’re friends with **the** Vanessa and Joseph?” 

  
  


“Uhm yeah- why?” Amata giggled, “They’re the coolest kids in the Vault! And the cutest couple I’ve ever seen.” 

“Oh. Well I like them. They’re really nice.” Joseph gave Ariela a wave before continuing to talk to his friends and Amata and Fred squealed thinking it was the coolest shit they’d ever seen.

“What’re you nerds squealing about?” Janice Wilkins comments with her brother Jim at her side. 

“None’ya Janice.” Freddie snapped back and Amata was shocked Freddie had it in him to snap back at anybody. It made Ariela laugh at the exchange since- well it was pretty funny and that just gave her the short stick.

“What’re you laughing about? You look like Frankenstiens wife!” That wiped the smile off her face quickly and just made a frown settle on her face as Jimmy took the cake. “You think anybody’s your friend cause they wanna be? I’m sure Amata was told to be your friend by her Daddy and Freddie here is just a freak like **you** .” It was enough. Enough to bring tears to her eyes that she held in while stomping out of the gym and into the hallway as she finally let the tears fall as she went straight into the bathroom and looked at her reflection. It hurt even more when she realized she really did look like Frankenstein's wife. Ariela was lied to. Straight to her face by everyone she cared about. She was just a walking mutation, a monster people pitied, couldn’t even write or read properly. Ariela was just about to undo everything when she heard the bathroom door open and she wasn’t ready for a round two.  
  
Ariel felt like she was about to throw up.

“You okay?” It was Butch and for some reason it irritated her more that it was him. The act was beginning to piss her off. 

“You-- Just leave me alone Butch I can’t take anymore of y-your mea-patronizing!” Ariela kept her back to him and only looked at him when she could see his reflection level to hers. 

_Since when was he my height?--_

“M’not here to be mean Ariel.” Ariel didn’t buy it one bit but then she realized it--

“Wait. S-Say that again?” Butch blushed when she whipped her head around to look at him head on. 

“I uh- I’m not here to fight you Ariel?” Ariel blushed a little at that, and the why she asked him to repeat himself was beyond him. 

_He said it right.._

_Everyone always adds the A at the end that_ **_isn’t_ ** _there. But he got it right._

“How do you— It’s doesn’t matter,” Ariel puffed up her cheeks, “What did you want Butch?” 

“I just wanted to see if you were alright- you just ran off and didn’t say anything to anybody-“ 

“What’s it to you Butch?” Ariel took his curiosity and kindness as some kind of trick and she wasn’t about to cry twice tonight. 

“Nothin’ really. Just wanted to know alright?” 

“Well now you know Butch.” They stood in silence and Butch kept swaying his weight between his feet like he was waiting for her to say something else, **anything** else. 

“You look.. Like a girl.”

_Real smooth Butch. Re~al smooth pal._

“Uhuh. Well I don’t know if you need to see an optometrist or what because yeah- I **am** a girl Butch. You gonna say I never looked like one till now?” Ariel was at her wits and was so close to getting into a screaming match with Butch or run home and cry in bed. Maybe in that order. 

“No- No! I didn’t even **say** that Ariel, now you’re putting words in my mouth!” 

“Whatever Butch. I’m tired and I’m going home.” 

_No, no. This ain’t how it’s supposed to go!_

“Wait! Uh- What about the fruit punch and the snacks?” Ariel scowled at him after he’d grabbed at her arm as she answered and continued for the door again, “I have food at home.” 

“Well- Well, what about the dance! You didn’t even dance to the slow song, so maybe you ought to come back and have fun—“ 

“Butch- this isn’t how I have fun! I-I’m tired! I wanna go ho-home!” Ariel tried to hold it in a little longer but she couldn’t help the hot tears that spilled over her lids. 

Butch failed. There was no way he could ask her to dance with him now, or be his friend, or hang out with him. Or play tag in the gymnasium with him. She was tired and wanted to go to bed. Said it right in front of him. Even though it wasn’t because of him he felt like he played a part in it. Everyone did. Anyone that was a bystander did. 

Butch stayed silent as she pushed past him and pressed on. 

Watched as she stomped away in her boots praying maybe she’d turn around and look at him, maybe turn back to him and they’d reconcile. He could get to be friends with her. But all she did was turn back and give him a look he couldn’t describe and one that he returned.  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hope u enjoyed this chapter, i feel like it got a little messy at the end but that s how i wanted their relationship to be converted towards the end. a confusing jumbled mess.


	3. loops

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i honestly dont know what to say abt this chapter it has ups and downs and i hope u enjoy how i did them and played around with the lore :) OH TW: Death / Angst(?) i don’t want to trigger anyone with that and i just realized it might so i wanna put a warning

“Wow look at you Ariel,” Amata swiveled Ariel in her seat towards the mirror in Amata’s bedroom so she could see the makeup she’d done. 

“You’re so good at makeup Amata, I wish I could be as good as you,” Ariel said admiring the glimmer of blue eyeshadow and green in the crease. 

“You’re like a princess!” She says but frowns, “Your hair just is two different colors though,” And Ariel’s chest sinks a little at the mention. 

“Anyway- let’s do you now Amata,” Ariel did a pink and red eyeshadow look that ended up blending together, but Amata liked it nonetheless so she was happy with the outcome of her friend as well. 

“Why’d we do our makeup anyways?” Ariel says munching on crisps, messing up the lipstick Amata put on her earlier. 

“We’re going to go eat at the diner right? I’m sure cute boys will be there..” Amata made her eyebrows do a dance on her forehead and Ariel stuck her tongue out with potato crisps on it and Amata gagged. 

“Ew Ariela! Now come on get up, let’s go, I’m hungry and I wanna see if Fred’s there,” Ariel put the crisps aside and wiped the rest of her lipstick off to avoid a butthole lip style. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Upon entering, all Ariel had in her mind after entering the diner was what was on the menu tonight and once she realized it was soft taco tuesday she jumped on it. Almost cutting some kid in line due to the height difference. 

Ariel was thirteen now, **and** a freshman.

 _Which is kind of a big deal if you didn’t know that already_. 

“Hey Fred!” Amata was saying hi to the boys in a booth first while Ariel got her food. 

Freddie changed after eighth grade like a switch went off in him, ever since he became friends with those gang-life wanna-be’s he wasn’t so sweet anymore and was very bipolar with the way he treated Ariel and Amata. Depending on if he was around people he wouldn’t even bat an eye her way, but if they were alone he’d try to pick up the pieces he’d broken. Maybe she was too forgiving, but because she knew his syndrome she felt a little inclined to be more understanding of Freddie. They were all just trying to fit in like everybody else anyways. 

“Oh hey Jo- _Oh my!_ ” Ariel caught Joseph out of her peripherals entering the diner and it shocked Ariel once she’d laid eyes on the band on his hand he was lowkey trying to show off to her. 

“You did it?” 

Joseph made a little hand gesture, 

“You’re damn right I did, I saw the way Bobby was eyeing her ring finger-“ Ariel had hands over her mouth in excitement as she processed the idea. 

“Oh Jo, this is so cute. I remember when you guys first started dating and I thought you guys had cooties.. Are you guys gonna get married after you start your jobs in the Vault or?-“ 

“For now we’re just engaged, she wants to make sure we have everything settled before everything, y’know?” Ariel hummed glancing back at her friend that was no longer standing in front of the boys in the booth. 

_Oh no- Where’d she go?!_

Amata was running out of the diner in tears and all she could hear was Fred’s obnoxious fake laugh over everyone else’s at the table. “Could you wrap this up for me Bessie? I gotta handle something.” 

“Sure baby, go ahead. But no fighting in my diner, you know the rules now don’t you?” Bessie put the food in a to-go box for Ariel on the side and continued tending to everyone else. 

“Yes, Bessie.” Ariel had it replaying in her head. 

_No fighting. No cussing. And no lip-locking in Bessie’s diner_. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


“Fred what was that?” Ariel says pointing to the door Amata ran out of. 

“What was what?” Fred says, looking to his boys that snickered and only fed his ego. 

“Your attitude Fred. The hell is wrong with you?” Ariel was trying hard not to raise her voice but it was hard not to be pissed off when people were laughing like you were the whole punchline of some joke. 

“Wrong with me? What’s wrong with you? You gain some weight fatty? Looks like Frankenstein’s getting a divorce, heyo!” Freddie says looking straight at the boys for validation, and boy did he get it. 

Ariel wasn’t gonna stoop to his level and bring up his insecurities, but she was gonna slap him into next week and that’s exactly what she did before leaving. “Screw you Fred.” Was all she’d said as Jim got up and yanked her back by the hair. He was the one she hated fighting- he didn’t care how hard he hit a girl, she didn’t know where he got it from since Mr. Wilkins was a kind man or maybe that’s what just seemed to be. 

“Come here **bitch**.” With a quick spin she headbutt him in the gut, rendering her free of Jimmy’s grasp and b-lined for Joseph’s side and hid behind him.

“Where do you think you’re goin’ pal?” Joseph had two heads on Jim, maybe even more but that didn’t mean jack to a degenerate. 

“You’re stayin’ your ass right here and if you try and touch the girl again I’ll smack your ass into next september. Got it wise guy?” Okay never mind, Jimmy was shitting bricks when Joey got in his face and found himself sitting right back down in the diner after Bessie gave him a look as well that he’d caught as he sat back down. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Butch watched the whole thing unravel. Of course he found what Freddie said was funny about Amata, but what he’d said about Ariel made him stutter a little as he laughed- nonetheless he **did** laugh. Right at her. Watched her get her hair pulled and everything by that idiot Jim. 

Lucky bastard got to touch her hair, he wished she'd let him touch it on her own accord. 

  
  


Wally spoke up after a while of silence, waiting for Joseph to leave the diner since he really was scaring the entire group enough to be silent in his presence. Once he’d walked out though that’s when he spoke up. 

“We gotta stop hitting the girls-“ 

Butch was first to second this without even hearing the rest of what Wally had to say. 

“So, that way. They’ll let us get it in.” But to Butch at the moment he’d thought it sounded like a brilliant idea.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


“You okay Amata?” Ariel had thanked Joseph for standing up for her and quickly went off to find Amata softly crying in the corner towards the bathrooms.

“I..” Amata frowned with a head shake, feeling drained from the back and forth from Freddie. “I thought Fred liked me!-- He said he did and everything, and then all of sudden now he doesn’t even wanna talk to me.” She wiped at her cheeks not wanting to mess up her makeup. “Said I looked like a clown and was flat as a board.” 

Ariel sighed giving her friend a pat on the back, “You’re beautiful Amata, really. I don’t think Fred would know beauty if it… If it hit him! ‘Kay?” Amata hugged Ariel suddenly and Ariel went a little stiff at that since- well- hugs weren’t something she was big on. But she knew her friend needed it.

“Really?” Amata asked, leaning her head on her friend's shoulder. “Course Amata. Now come on we gotta go get our tacos before Bessie gives them to someone else.”

“Wait!” Upon turning her head back to Amata her cheek was chastely kissed, and Ariel didn’t know if she should push Amata or be okay with it. She was leaning towards the latter.

“What was- Why’d you-?” Amata shrugged as she stood up not really giving her a straight answer and Ariel didn’t really care if she got one anyway in all honesty. It felt like the kind of kiss a friend would give.

“Cause, you’re my friend and- you’re sweet.” 

_Oh. Okay. That didn’t clear my mind one bit._

“Oh.” Ariel stood up as well. 

“ **And** you’re pretty.” Ariel blushed at the comment with an awkward laugh, unknowing of how to really respond to that other than with a polite curt ‘thanks.’

Suddenly, Amata looked a little sad and Ariel didn’t really know why since she thought her sadness over Fred was over.

“Well anyway- Let's head out.” 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Sophomore Year**

“Hey Ariela?” Said girl hummed a soft response still working.. **Struggling** with her history essay as she wrote it up in her chicken scratching hand writing no one was able to read. 

“What do you think about Christine?” Ariel lost concentration and accidentally wrote a ‘d’ in ‘be’ and grunted in frustration as she was tempted to rip the paper in half- “Which one Amata?” 

_Oh right. There was the graduating Christine and the one in their grade. Christine Kendall._ Amata pondered before answering. “Kendall. One in our class.” 

“Oh okay- What about her?” Amata had her chin cradled by her hands, watching as Ariel wrote her essay. Giving pointers every so often only if Ariel asked though. 

Ariel turned to Amata after hearing what she said and nervously looked behind her to see if James was there and heard what she said. “What? Is it weird?” Ariel shrugged, “ I don’t think so.. Did she say she- uhm- that she liked you too?” The worst part was done with and Amata was relieved Ariel didn’t question her when she said she found Christine pretty- but not in a regular way, and that she- **liked** her.

“Well, she said.. Well.. It’s complicated,” Ariel decided to take a break from the essay and put it off to the side, “What’s complicated about liking each other?” 

“Ariel. We **have** to reproduce. It’s kind of our ‘civic duty’ of living in the Vault.” Ariel rolled her eyes. “Amata. Who knows what could happen. You guys should just. I don’t know. Don’t rush it I guess. My Dad says rushing into a relationship can ruin mental health and cause problems for the Vault in the future.” 

Amata sighed with a hint of sorrow. “Yeah and my Dad said to anyone that was showing signs of being.. ‘Different’ and liking the same gender that they’ll be put in the conversion program.” 

Ariel snorted, “The what?” 

“Your Dad never told you? There’s a conversion program for us if we--” There was a call on the intercom before Amata could finish her sentence, the conversation in the air now.

Ariel answered the call, it was Mr. Almodovar asking for Amata to return to her quarters for the night which made sense. It was getting late. 

“I can walk you home if you want, I’m gonna bring my Dad dinner. He didn't pick it up like he said he would.” 

After dropping Amata back home, not like she really **needed** to be but it was a school night and she was bored and figured she would just hang out with Jonas and her Dad till she got tired enough. Though she had a feeling they’d make her go home. Her Dad was beginning to act strange and wouldn’t tell her everything he was working on anymore and if anything she felt as she got older he would tell her more, but it was the opposite and it was a lie if she said the less transparency there was between them.

Then she saw him sitting on the ground with his head in his hands, looking like a stray kitten licking its wounds while trying not to cry- trying to stay strong like it was their last straw.

Ariel should’ve kept walking, should’ve ignored him but she couldn't. She didn’t have the heart to be mean to someone in a vulnerable state. Couldn’t sit and watch someone hurt continue to suffer. So, when she’d walked over to him hesitant to even talk to him she cleared her throat. Butch avoided her eyes and kept them on the floor, “What do **you** want?” 

“Nothing..” Ariel crouched down to his level on the floor and caught sight of his bruised knuckles. Instinctively she worried about a splint in his bones from impacts that were too hard, and when her fingers so much as grazed his knuckles he flinched back almost pulling his hands away on instinct- “I’m not gonna hurt you..” He hated how much that soothed his nerves, but it did- Everything was hitting the fan at home and he had nowhere to go but James’ office, and there was only so much time he could spend at his friends quarters before he had to go back home. But he was sick of being a burden to everyone and would just sit outside of his quarters. Waiting for his parents to fall asleep so he could come back home and sleep. “Can I touch it?” Butch nodded his head remembering that she was still in front of him trying to check on him- Even though he could be a jerk-

“It doesn’t feel broken.. Does it hurt really bad?” She murmurs pressing gently on the ligaments of his hands waiting for him to wince- which was a good sign he didn’t. Broken hands never felt the same even after healing. 

“What happened?” He finally looked up at her when she had her focus on his hands still, quickly averting his eyes back down when she looked at him. Butch wasn’t gonna tell her the truth but he was sure she probably had an idea of what happened to him. She was probably the only that’d ever seen him cry over his mother and father. Only one that had ever wiped his tears and made him feel like he mattered to some extent in the world--

“Did you hear what I said Butch?” Butch snapped out the imaginary world in his head and nodded his head. 

“Uh yeah! Yeah- I uh, got in a fight with that idiot Mack. Bastard got the jump on me, but I got a few licks in.” Ariel didn’t buy into it but still nodded her head. “You should get this cleaned up, I’m on my way to see my Daddy so--” Butch snickered at the way she referred to her Father, and she rolled her eyes almost straight into the back of her head.

“No, no, no, I’m **not** going to your Daddy for help--”

“Well you have to clean this up or the scabbing will be infected.” She says knowing very well he wasn’t gonna take care of his wounds. 

“I- Well, why don’t you just do it for me?” Ariel made a face and brought her Father’s dinner up to his line of sight. 

“Oh- well- Just do it for me afterwards-” Butch was really pressing to not see James and it annoyed her-

“ **Why** are you so opposed to being tended to by him?”

“Cause! I..” Butch smacked his teeth with a deep set front, and had to gather the courage to say it out loud. “I go there a lot alright? I don’t wanna bother the guy.. Are you happy now?” Ariel wasn’t trying to patronize him but she also wasn’t very good with keeping people from blowing their top so she had no response for his snap at her.

“Wait here, I’ll be right back--”

“Wait!” Butch gently grabbed her hand before she could walk off, and his body’s instincts stopped him before his brain could catch up. “Don’t uh- Don’t be long alright?” 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


“Daddy?” James wasn’t in his office, he might be in Jonas’ office tonight instead since the terminal was left off and everything was neatly put away. She knew he’d come back when he was hungry of course. Ariel always left his food in his office. 

After placing his dinner down she grabbed the some extra bandages and stuffed them in a little to-go bag for herself before heading off and went back to Butch still sitting in the same spot. “Follow me Butch.” Ariel waited for him around the corner just incase Security Hannon was patrolling at the moment. Turning back to Butch after the coast was clear she gasped in surprise when she noticed Butch’s face was no longer level with her own. 

“Where’re we goin’” Butch followed her closely as they walked to wherever she was going, he guessed her quarters and he suddenly remembered how long it had been since he’d been there and wondered. 

“My quarters.” _Right. Right._

“Oh? Alright then..” 

Butch was sitting on her toilet with the seat down watching her like a hawk as she wrapped his knuckles up after cleaning it and caught himself staring closely, catching the way she bit her lip when she found skin beginning to peel and would gently flatten it. “You got nice hands Ariel. Like those sistine chapel kind of hands.” Said girl smiled sweetly at the comment and shook her head. “I don’t know what you mean Butch.” Ariel filled a swab with alcohol after checking how deep he cut was and after she realized it was deep she decided to just use medical tape to keep it shut. 

“Poliose right?” He started and she shook her head softly correcting him, “Poliosis..” 

Butch found himself smiling to the side but winced a little as he opened the cut a little.

“And your eyes?”

“Heterochromia..” Ariel threw out the exposed stuff into the bin and noticed he’d been watching her every move and made her instinctively fix her own posture. 

“Yeah… Well anyway, I have to finish my history essay,” Butch gave her a look with lifted brows. 

“The essay is due tomorrow and you’re doing it tonight?” Ariel nodded her head puffing her cheeks as she tried to avert the attention elsewhere.

“Eh yeah- I like.. I like to do stuff last minute.”

“Sure Ariel… Sounds to me like you’re having trouble with it.” Ariel blushed as she stood up and made her way to her room to finish her work.

“I am **not** struggling with the essay.” Ariel crossed her arms over her chest and Butch had to correct himself quickly. 

“Alright.. So lemme see it. You said you’re almost done anyways.” She did that thing where she’d puff her cheeks a little when she was thinking over something and he found himself smirking.

  
“ **Fine.** ” Ariel slid into her room and snatched up her essay and once Butch had laid his eyes on her handwriting he hummed in thought- She knew damn well he wasn’t actually reading it. No one could read her hand writing. 

“Well, it looks alright to me but.. You have uh what’s it called.. Dys- uhm- something with a g, right?” 

_How the hell did he know?! There’s no way I’m gonna confirm I struggle with writing- I’ll never hear the end of it from Butch and those jerks!_

“I don’t! It's just my- my draft.”

“Your draft.. At midnight?” Ariel snatched the papers out of his hands and stuck her tongue out since she didn’t really have a comeback for that and Butch barked a laugh at her. 

“M’not making fun of your handwriting! Honest. Cross my heart and everything.” Butch says, even crossing his heart in front of her. Ariel just grumbled in response to that and just walked back into her room to finish her essay. 

“Whatever Butch.”

Butch was about to follow her into her room, but she stopped him in the doorway. “Stay in the living room please.” 

_Aw man. I thought I’d get to see what her room looked like! Come on Ari lemme in!_

“Oh come on Ariel you know I mean you no harm right?” That was in part true- Butch stopped getting into fights with her, but his annoying attitude was still very prevalent between them. He still did stupid things she didn’t like and was still obnoxious towards her. 

“Fine, but **don’t** touch anything.” 

Not even a minute later he was touching something on her made bed, and when he said its name she blushed furiously.

“You still _have_ Mr.Cuddlebuns?” Ariel spun around in her chair to face him and the look he had on his face wasn’t recognizable, but it looked almost reminiscent.. Butch gave it to her in eighth grade when they were on good terms- when he used to visit whenever things at home weren’t going well. 

He remembered it. When he gave it to her. Said it was for her when he wasn’t there. If only he was that tender now. So caring when he’d placed the thing in her hands- Ariel knew he made it for her. Could tell when she noticed the pricks on his fingers and the little band-aids he put on haphazardly. 

Butch didn’t think she’d keep it. Thought maybe after high school she’d’ve thrown it out. Sick of his assholery. If that was a word. He thought it was.

“Yeah… I do still have him.” Ariel must’ve been done with her essay cause she stapled the papers together and put it away.

“Why?” Ariel could’ve shrugged and just said she didn’t know, but it wasn’t like it was on a shelf forgotten. It was on her bed. Made up with her pillows and had an added ribbon he remembers seeing in her hair a lot as a kid. So, a simple shrug would make him press further. 

“I like it..?” Butch still had it in his hands and when he took a seat on her bed she cringed a little as the neat freak in her hit a little as she thought about where his behind was earlier. So, she followed him and sat down on her bed with him. “I guessed that much Ariel but why? Why keep something **I** gave you?” 

Ariel knew what he meant by that. The emphasis on ‘I’. Why did she keep it? That wasn’t an easy answer, and she didn't know if she wanted to give it to him either since- she didn’t even know why herself. So she just said why she liked the bear with mix-match button eyes.

“It helps me sleep..” Ariel reached out, wanting to hold it now and he handed it off to her gently. “And..” Butch watched as her slim fingers traced over its button eyes and it made him remember how long it took him to find the right brown color for her hazel one and the green for the other. It was like a sea green and the hazel reminded him of the beautiful pine trees he’d seen in his textbooks. Tall and strong. He’d never tell anyone but he liked learning about nature.

“I can tell.. Tell it was made with _care_ at the time.” Butch saw the way her lips pulled into a shy smile and when he realized he was the reason for it, it combed his ego and put him on a little high. Entranced by her. They sat in silence after she said that and he placed his finger over an eye as well, and the spot where their fingers touched burned as he murmured. “Took me forever to find the right buttons.. For your eyes..” Ariel smiled knowingly with a soft huff from the faint laugh. “Ms. Palmer told me you were coming in and out asking to look at her buttons..” 

“Palmer _ratted_ me out?” Butch’s voice was soft again and she found herself matching it. 

_“Mhm_..” Ariel finally faced him and she was biting her bottom lip to stifle her smile and Butch found himself copying her. “I’m afraid so Butch-man.” Butch had a side-smile at that and his free hand had leaned into the bed and Ariel had always known he was getting bigger but- the size difference was never noticed while sitting down. 

They didn’t really know what the hell was happening. It wasn’t planned in Butch’s head to start leaning into her personal space she was always so adamant about. Or to brush his thumb over the top of her finger tips. 

“What’re you doing?...” She whispers and he almost visibly shivered when he felt her breath on his lips. 

“I dunno honestly..” They both nervously laughed and Butch found himself moving closer- close enough for the sides of their hips to be pressed against each other.

“Why do you keep moving closer?” She knew why he was, but didn’t know why she wasn’t scolding him for being in her personal bubble. Why she hadn’t pushed him away or corrected him. Ariel didn’t mind it- 

“Would you be mad at me if I kissed you?” The inhale she’d taken after he said that to her burned like she’d slowly taken a dip into a hot bath. 

“I dunno honestly..” Ariel said what he did unknowingly and he snorted at the similarity. Butch would’ve already kissed the girl he was alone with by now, but he felt like he was standing on ice and one wrong step would shatter the only ground under him forever. Butch knew if she’d been looking at his hands she could see how scared he was, so the relief in their eyes being locked was also making him turn to jelly. 

“So then maybe…”

  
  
  
  


“Ariel? Are you asleep?” Ariel practically flew up to her feet and Butch immediately stood up as well. She didn’t know why she was in a panic- they weren’t really doing anything. But she still grabbed him and was about to push him into her closet to hide him when her door opened. 

“Oh, Butch.” James squinted his eyes at Butch, and Ariel quickly removed her grip from his jacket and looked between Butch and her Father. 

“Hm. Well. It was nice seeing you Butch but I believe its time you head home.. Its a school night,” Butch nodded his head looking between Ariel and James. 

“Oh yeah- yeah! Of course Dr. Ibriham. Uhm- I hope the essay comes out good Ari. See you later?” Ariel nodded her head bitting her lip to stop her from saying anything dumb. 

Butch scrammed after that and smoothly walked out and headed straight for his quarters.

James watched him leave and looked to Ariel with a chuckle. “Ari?” Ariel nodded her head itching the back of his head.

“I didn’t know you and Butch are friends again--” James leaned against the wall with his eyebrows lifted.

“We- We’re not friends Daddy he- he was just helping me with my essay.”

“How nice of Butch.. Well, remember everything I taught you dear-” 

Ariel groaned, plugging her ears up with her fingers, “La, la, la, la- I’m not listening Daddy thats **gross**!”

“You have to stay safe Ariel!--” Ariel slammed the button to shut her door and covered her face with her hands as she threw herself onto her bed, cheeks burning with embarrassment. 

_I- I almost kissed Butch!_

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Butch felt high as he made his way home, it was a short walk of course but he took his sweet time so he could think on what had happened. 

_I almost kissed her.. And she- she might’ve let me?_

Butch had a fat smile on his face as he entered his quarters and they were arguing again. This time about his mother being a whore- which was hard to deny. She **did** lock lips with Mr. Mack a couple times and who knew what else. It was common knowledge that they’d kissed. They were caught by that middle schooler in the hallway to the reactor level by Chip Taylor. 

But something was different. He felt it in his gut that something was wrong. So awfully wrong here. 

He noticed it when he saw how beet red his Father's face was. The way he started clutching at his chest and heaving breaths. He was having a heart attack. 

“Johnny? Oh god John! Get up John! Butch help your Father!” Butch just watched him. Shakily standing there as he watched his Father gasp for air. His ears were ringing like he had tinnitus and he didn’t know why he was so glued to the floor. Why he wasn’t running to get a doctor- He felt kind of evil- Not caring that his Father was losing life in his eyes as his Mother ran to get James. 

“Butch you fuckin’-- You--” Butch turned away from his Father as he heard James come rushing in with his Mother. Though he didn’t realize Ariel was pulling on his arm- trying to stop him from looking to get him moving out of the living room.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Butch’s eyes were dry as he sat in the doctors office. Waiting for what James had to say. 

He knew.. He knew his Father was dead. Knew he was dead once he hit the floor in the living room. 

“Butch?” It was Ariel trying to get him to speak again. He didn’t wanna talk. He had nothing to say about that bastard. 

“Butch!” It was his Mother this time- and he could hear the anger in her heart as she said it.

The slap she’d given him threw him for a loop and the rest of the night had been a big blur. 

He was in his room now- He guessed his mother was grieving in the living room due to the muffled cries. Butch wanted to cry. But there was no reason to. He’d cried so much for so long because of him- there was no tears left in him. And his own Mother blamed him for the death- As if he could stop kidney failure... He stopped going to his dialysis appointments. It was only a matter of time. Butch’s head was spinning now- and everything was- so confusing. He just- He needed something. Something to soothe that deep sunken feeling in his heart- maybe his Father had a bright idea using the bottles..

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> phew- lemme know what u think abt this chapter and what im doing with butch- its been a while since i last played fallout 3 so if u feel like i may be getting his character wrong lmk how i can improve it


	4. inside

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> insight of Butch's day to day. amata and christine might be.. a thing o.o .. ariel still doesnt know what her place could be in the vault. even with the goat results.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is lowkey filler but not rlly since its mostly just for like a before the Escape! quest

“Wow Butch… That was somethin’ else, I didn’t know you could be so.. **_rough_ **,” Susie giggled trying to wrap her arms around Butch’s tense shoulders and he allowed her to for now. 

“Maybe a round two? You feel so… tense.” Susie says trying to give him a back massage and he really wasn’t having it- this domestic shit. Butch shrugged her off him and he stood up to slip back into his vault suit. 

“What’s the matter Butch?” 

“M’tired. Gonna go home—“ 

“You don’t wanna stay with me?” Susie stood up with her blanket around her and looked like she was shocked to see him go so fast- 

“Susie.. I had a good time with ya really- but I’m sluggish and I don’t think I should stay here any longer than I have you dig?” Right. Wally might not like him banging his sister. But that made it all the more exciting for Susie in her opinion. 

Butch had been slipping on his jacket when she’d said it. He punched the last person that brought it up, but he wasn’t gonna do that to a lady. 

“Butch I know you lost your Father and all but—“ 

“Don’t!” He was irate she thought she could bring that up. Right after they fucked as well. Real mood buzzer. “Do **not** bring that bastard up. Ever. Again.” 

“But Butch you could tell me! Speak to me come on’ we could have a heart to heart Butch- It’d be good to talk about-“ He was already out the door shutting it behind him before she could finish her sentence and she’d sat back down on her bed. Defeated. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Butch **hated** when anybody brought it up. That night. It’s been a few months since it happened. Since his death. 

And god he was feeling it again. That- That anxiety is what Dr. Ibriham called it. It was eating at him as he remembered it all over again. What his Father had said to him before he died. Or at least **_tried_ **to say before he died. 

Butch needed a shower and a fucking meal in him. His mouth was dry and he felt sick to his stomach as he entered his quarters and went straight for a water, glancing around the room for his Mother and made his way straight into the bathroom to take a shower. 

It felt weird without him there. Butch exited the shower eyeing the sunken spot in the couch his Father was always glued in. And the ashtray that had at least a few butts in them and the smell accompanied by them. It of course smelled of cigarettes, his mother smokes as well. That smell would never go away. 

Butch looked at the shelf behind the couch- at the photos. What ever happened? Was it his fault? Was it really? Did he make them want to become alcoholics? What did he do **_wrong_ **?

It made him want to cry and wallow in it all. In his thoughts. But he shouldn’t- **_wouldn’t_ **. James had consoled him when he’d gotten the chance to- the guy really was a great man. Reassured him it was just his Father's time, that the drinking caught up with him. Gave him a hug and everything- told him he was there for him if he needed him. 

But the real tear jerker had been when Ariel gave him the longest hug he’d ever had, pet the back of his head and never questioned the tears he’d put on her shoulder. Never asked him to talk about it. Talk about his past. Just held him and validated him. Not his ego but him- his heart. That’s the best way he could explain how it felt. Butch knew she wouldn’t admit it but she was crying as well softly- wasn’t that it felt good she was crying as well but it was wholesome. He could tell she really cared when he felt the hiccups in her breath.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Ariel’s birthday was soon. Butch knew it by heart, and he wondered if it was appropriate to give her a gift or not. I mean he cried in her arm’s for crying out loud. **_And_ **kind of sort of almost kissed her like it was a destined moment with Frankie Valli singing in the background.

He was thinking about it during class. Mr. Brotch was being a pain in his ass specifically asking him for the answer to the questions when he saw him zoning out and or staring at Ariel. 

“Mr. DeLoria keep your eyes on the board please.” Butch snapped his eyes to the board before anybody could even turn their heads to look at him, “What’re ya talkin’ about Mr. Brotch? I’m payin’ attention. The answers 1787 for the Constitution.” Mr. Brotch was pleasantly surprised he’d given the correct answer and that was enough to get him off Butch’s back. 

Butch noticed she’d done something different with her hair and had them in two puffs on the back of her head, some hairs were loose in the puffs and he wished she’d let him touch her hair. It was such a baby thing to want but he did- Ariel felt like something was shooting lasers in the back of her head and when she noticed it was Butch she didn’t know if she should wave or ignore it. 

She chose to ignore it and missed the small wave Butch had given her, and Mr. Brotch caught the whole thing and snickered to himself as he continued the lesson. He looked like a pup that got ignored a few pets. 

Susie just so happened to glance at Butch and followed his line of sight, she thought he was looking at her and it was confirmed he wasn’t when he didn’t wave back at her. It pissed her off really- so much so that she too the big blob of gum outta her mouth and smooshed it right into her hair without her noticing. 

Once Ariel had even realized it, Amata had noticed the pink blob in her hair and Ariel gasped absolutely mortified, she tried to pull it out only to wince. It was too deep and was latched onto her hair. Ariel’s eyes were burning with the threat of tears as she realized there was no way she was getting it out. 

“It’s gonna be okay Ariela! Come on, let’s go to Bobby and see what he can do,” Ariel shook her head and denied the offer as she packed her stuff back into her knapsack. 

“Just.. Leave me alone Amata I’m not- I’m not in the mood.” Christine was approaching Amata and Ariel but Ariel had already run off. 

“She’ll be okay I think.. Come on let’s go get some lunch Chris,” Amata and Christine had walked off together and Butch was left with Wally and Paul who were talking about Kendall’s breasts when he was asked who he’d bone.

“Huh?” Butch laughed to hide his suspicions, “I don’t kiss and tell boys. Now let’s get outta here.” As they were leaving Susie had went to join them and received a death glare from Butch to buzz off. In actuality Butch wanted to see if Ariel was okay, if she was crying over possibly having to cut her hair off- she’d had it long for so long and it was beautiful to him. Not a split end in sight.

All he could think about while eating was where the hell she was- They passed Bobby’s salon and he was nowhere to be found. He stopped Amata before she could leave with Christine after they finished eating. He purposely was taking forever to finish so his boys would leave him and head into the gymnasium before they’d notice he was gone for so long.

“Hey, wait up! Uh Amata could I talk to you?” Christine even gave him a bewildered look when he said he wanted to talk to her. 

“What is it Butch? Gonna put gum in my hair too?” Butch scoffed, “The hell are you talking about I didn’t--! Ugh whatever, did you see where Ariel went?” 

Amata wasn’t gonna budge so easily. Not without a good reason. 

“Why?” 

Butch almost ran his hands through his hair till he remembered how long it took him to get it just right that morning. “Amata. I just wanted to ask her if the hair situation was okay.. I know she likes her hair long, is all. Swear on it.” Amata budged enough for him. She knew that was true and knew the possible departure wasn’t gonna be fun at all. Made her realize letting Ariel go alone wasn’t a good idea after all. 

“I- Yeah- She does like it long.. Uhm, she might’ve gone to Joseph’s quarters I don’t know though. Ariela might not want to talk- She looked upset.” Amata sighs glancing at Christine who was waiting at the door for her. “Thanks Amata, really.” 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


“What happened?— Hey Van what the hell happened who put a fat chode of gum in her hair?” Joseph was fuming- they’d just finished a test in Mrs. Richards class and he already knew he bombed it, so seeing a friend upset was just throwing him off the edge. 

Vanessa had come out of the classroom after giving someone their pen back and when she saw the big thing in Ariel’s hair she gasped, “Oh shit!- Come to my place I’ll try and save as much as I can,” 

So there she was sitting in Vanessa’s chair as she tried to get as much of the gum loose as possible before she started cutting. Ariel’s eyes burned like she’d been crying and Joseph was asking her who did it- and if it was that big idiot that bothers her and she denied it even though she wasn’t even sure who did it. 

“I swear I oughta teach that kid a lesson- No respect for nobody! Little shit-“ The doorbell rang cutting him off. “Little shit heads!” As he opened the door Butch came into his line of sight and he laughed at the comedic timing. 

“You know I ought to knock your teeth in kid, who the hell did it huh? Was it you? So God help me if it was you—“ Butch put his arms up passively while shaking it head. “Hey, Hey! I swear it wasn’t me. I’d never- I’d never put gum in her hair, I know how much it means to her!” Joseph grabbed him by the collar and that was enough for Ariel as she watched it all unfold in front of Vanessa’s vanity. 

“Let him go Joey, I- He’s telling the truth it **wasn’t** him.” As though Ariel had called off a killer dog Joseph let go of him and sighed, letting the kid in as well since she’d asked him so nicely. 

“I.. I ain’t seen who did it but I got an idea..” Ariel looked at him through the mirror and he felt guilty seeing the look she had. 

Vanessa had finished getting as much out as she could and when she showed Ariel how much she had to cut, the waterworks were threatening to come streaming down her eyes like a fountain. 

“Hey, it’s gonna be ok Ariela.. I’ll make it look good and hey! It’ll be like- up to here by senior photos!” Van sighed solemnly and began the haircut. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


“Butch?” He was at her disposal as soon as she heard the B start against her lips. 

“Yeah?” Butch sat on the side of her just- sitting there- and it both confused her and made her nervous with all the staring he was doing. 

“Tell me the truth.” For some reason that made Butch’s heart sink and the fear that bubbles up in his stomach was implacable. 

“Go ahead Ari..” 

“Did you make someone do it?...” 

“I wouldn’t-“ 

“I’m not asking you if you would or wouldn’t Butch- M’asking if you **did**.” Butch shook his head still watching as Van cleaned up the ends and started smoothing her fingers through the curling up hair with a moisturizer. Ariel didn’t like using the iron on her hair. It scared her when her curl pattern got messed up the first time and she’d vowed to never touch one again. 

“I didn’t. I wished I saw it happen, Brotch was getting on my case before because…. Because I was spacing out and so I stopped looking your way and as soon as I did- class was dismissed and you had a big thing of gum in your hair- I heard Amata pointing it out to you but then you’d run off and.. yeah.” Van could hear it, in his voice was sincerity, but something else was there and when she looked at Joe who was already looking at her they smirked to themselves. They’d make bets on it later. 

“You don’t have to stay Butch, I’m.. I’m probably gonna just head to the labs then go home.” Butch’s response was delayed, watching as her hair flowed beautifully like a halo around her head like an angel. After processing what she said after that millisecond that went by in slow motion for him he shook his head. 

“We should eat something..” Van smiled while sweeping her hair up, giving a knowing look to her boyfriend- fiance and had to hold back their snickers so he could finish what he was saying. Ariel lifted a brow at ‘we’, “We?” 

“Yeah- together, or something like that.. I uh, haven’t eaten- You don’t have to come with me if you don’t want to!” Butch didn’t want her to feel inclined to do it and was blushing like crazy when he noticed the look Joey was shooting his way from across the room.

“Ok.” Ariel said it simply and was grabbing her knapsack, ready to go but Butch thought- expected her to say no so when she motioned for him to follow he was dazed.

“You coming or not Butch?” 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


“Hi, Baby, what’re you gonna have today?” Bessie was the best cook the Vault had ever had. Able to make delicious meals out of pre-war dehydrated meal items and the vegetables they had at disposal through the planting system in the Vault.

“I have some salisbury steak juiced up with some peas, or you could have a ‘chicken’ and veggie pot pie.” Ariel hummed in thought but what Butch wanted was a quick response. 

“I’ll take the steak Bessie,” The woman hadn’t even noticed Butch and when Bessie gave her the ‘You’re with **_him_ **?’ look making Ariel puff her cheeks and just said her order. “Veggie

pot pie please.” 

“Go head and sit down, I'll bring it over when it’s done.” 

As soon as they were seated Butch had gotten up and grabbed Ariel a glass of water knowing she wasn’t big on Nuka-cola or the powdered pop juice they had available to stir in water for flavor. They had a fizz machine as well that was in the works by Bessie for sparkling water. Bessie wasn’t just a good cook but was creative enough that matched her intelligence. 

“So, you two made up?” Bessie says placing the plates down. “Last time I saw you two in the same place, ya almost scrapped it out in my diner.” Ariel had a mouth full of pot pie and Bessie knew it was on purpose as Butch flustered up an answer to that. 

“That was a while ago Bessie- I don’t hit ladies now,” Butch defends himself and Bessie hummed, “Mhm, well, I’ll leave you to it, enjoy.” 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Ariel kept her eyes mainly on her food since she could feel Butch’s eyes boring into her everything while she ate, “You should take a picture..” 

“Huh?” Butch averted his eyes quick and stuffed his face as though he hadn’t just been staring a second ago. 

“Cause you were staring.” Ariel hid her smirk by putting a spoonful of re-hydrated veggies in her mouth. 

“I ain’t starin’. I think you really do need glasses Ariel.” Butch ate his food fairly quickly. Scarfing it down like it was a last meal instead of taking it slow. She realized he always rushed while eating- and it got her to thinking if that habit was grown from his home life. Ariel didn’t mean to vocalize it as a question, was gonna just linger on it but it came out. 

“Why do you eat so fast? It’s not going anywhere.” Butch gave her a scowl he didn’t mean to and snapped at her.  
“So what if I eat fast. Is that a problem for you?” Ariel bit her lip and shook her head. 

“It doesn’t bother me or affect me. But I just wanted to know why you eat so fast-”

Butch was quick-witted.

“I think you just eat too slow.” Ariel puffed her cheeks and folded her arms over her chest. 

“Butch.” She said it softly to calm him but he felt like he was being scrutinized more than anything.

“What!” Ariel jumped when he raised his voice and she put her hands out to shut him up since he caught the attention of Bessie and some people enjoying themselves.

“Butch- _stop_! What the hell is wrong with you?” Ariel whisper yelled pushing her plate to the side to indicate she was finished. She was in disbelief she’d pushed his buttons. She thought they were on good terms now.

“Wrong with me? What’s wrong with you? You--” He cut himself off realizes what the hell he was about to say, and Ariel was already fed up and by the time he could verbalize an apology she had splashed him in the face with her glass of water.

“I know what you were gonna say. Guess you’re still a _jerk._ ” With that she left the diner as fast as she could manage while Butch just processed what the hell just happened. 

With a groan he put his head in his hands feeling the gel already getting fucked up from the water, and as he was getting up Bessie approached him. 

“You betta go on and get your act right young man. You don’t have to pay for your meal just go. I don’t wanna see no more fightin’ in my diner Butch. You hear me?” Bessie had her cleaver still in her hand and brought it up for emphasis. 

Butch nodded his head with his hands up, “I didn’t mean her no harm I swear I just- I don’t know what got into me.” Bessie moved back and pointed to the door. 

“You don’t gotta tell me that. You gotta tell her.” 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Butch lingered around her quarters, pacing back and forth as he thought of how he could go by it. 

‘ _Sorry! I thought you confused you for my abusive Father.’ No- That’s terrible._

_‘Sorry I almost talked about your insecurities, you triggered my own and-’ Yeah no. I ain’t apologizing screw that._

Then he remembered that night as he was about to walk away. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**_Butch’s eyes were against her shoulder. He didn’t know how he got there but he wasn’t complaining. It felt like he was in his Mother's arms, before all the alcohol and cloudy eyed gaze she gained whilst yelling at him or with her Father. It was consoling and warm. And the gentle rubbing against his back soothed the burning ache in his lungs as he cried silently, trying to hold in his cries._ **

**_If he wasn’t so busy being a baby he would’ve relished in being in her arms a little more frivolously and less of a- ‘You’re so kind and sweet smelling its making me cry even more.’_ **

**_“It’s not your fault Butch.” Ariel said it till he stopped shaking his head against her shoulder and was just leaning there. Just a fit of sniffles and shaky inhales and exhales. She never got awkward or pushed him away like they were on a timer._ **

**_“M’sorry.. I ruined your suit.”_ **

**_Ariel shrugged, “Eh, it’s fine I got a bunch inside my drawers.” \_ **

**_“You’re too nice Ariel.”_ **

**_“No, m’not..”_ **

**_Butch thought she was the most beautiful girl he’d ever met in that moment._ **

**_Not by looks-- thought he did think she was, it was by heart._ **

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


So now he was standing in front of her quarters wondering if she’d even open the door for him or not. He was rude and despite being uncalled for he didn’t- shouldn’t have even started that sentence he found himself calling her over the years just like everybody else.

Butch was about to walk off when the doors had opened and James coming through. Probably working late with Jonas again. He greeted him respectfully and James had that smirk on his face as though he knew what was going on. 

“Are you here to visit me?” Butch blushed and shook his head while scratching at his head. 

“Nah, Dr. Ibriham. I uh, I wanted to speak to Ariel before I went to bed.” James nodded his head leaning against the shut door. 

“Well. It isn’t up to me if you can come in and talk to her or not. So, if you _are_ here to speak with her, I’d recommend knocking on the door,” Butch nervously laughed. “Hah, yeah. Thanks for the advice Dr.” 

“Now if you’ll excuse me I have work to attend to. Good luck Butch, and take it easy.” 

_Right. Right. Take it easy._

After James had left and Butch was sure he wasn’t standing around the corner or anything he headed over to the door and gave it a ring. Until it had been a minute and he did it again. And again- and-

“Daddy if you forget your keys ag--!” _Oop!_ “Oh, what’re **you** doing here?” Butch’s eyes had to stay on her eyes cause he knew if he looked down he wouldn’t be able to look back up. She obviously rushed out of the shower and her hair was wet and soaking a little into her nightwear that he’d never seen Susie or Janice wear from the standard clothes given to everyone. 

“I wanted to just talk to you Ariel--” 

“There’s nothing to talk about-” He snapped at her, his short fuse wasn’t something he ever worked on. 

“There is! I just, I wanted to say it to you before it was tomorrow and was too late.” 

“Could you just.. Listen and then I-”

“Butch I’ve done **a lot** of listening to you over the years and.. I think I’m just about done.”

“Ariel please, just gimme this chance alright? Now let me in before Officer Taylor sees me or somethin’.” She was just about to tell him ‘No’ when speak of the devil, Officer Taylor could be seen patrolling through the grated walls between the hallway and Ariel pulled Butch into her quarters and shut the door in the nick of time. 

“Told you so…” Butch went silent after he realized how close the two were and she must’ve realized too since she stepped back so fast she bumped into her couch’s armrest and made it look like she meant to do it by just sitting there with her arms crossed. 

“Anyway uhm.. I know what I was gonna say- and that’s cause it was a force of habit, I know it isn’t a good habit, I know it isn’t. So, so… What I wanted to say was I didn’t mean to say it this time. And I- I’d never say it again after today. Ever.” Butch felt like his apology was lame and she would throw him out for it.

Ariel was a little shocked he was admitting to his habit, and it warmed her heart a little that he realized what it did to her. A simple word used many times by many people. It garnered a pierce in her skin, but now.. Now it would become a scar.

“I accept your apology.” Her Father had always taught her to never say ‘it’s okay’, to accept someone’s apology not the action that garnered the need for one. 

“So.. Forgiven?” 

“For now..” Butch huffed a short laugh at that and he brushed his fingers through his hair and kinda wished he’d put gel in before he came, but he wasn’t about to go to sleep with gel in his hair and turn it to crisps. 

There was a silence of, _so what now?,_ in the air so he decided it would be good to go now. He’d done what he intended and it wasn’t like making a move or chatting was on the table so he started to go. 

“Butch?” Said boy jumped when she called out to him and he took a small peep at her chest cause- who could help themselves? And he snapped his eyes back up. 

“Goodnight.” 

“Night Ariel.” But then he remembered what he was gonna ask her back at the diner. 

“Are you doing anything for your birthday this year?”

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


“Nice haircut Ariel,” Susie sighed. “Anybody that puts gum in someones hair is pure evil. Can’t believe someone did that to--” Ariel rolled her eyes.

“I’m not _that_ naive Susie. I know you did it.” Ariel was gonna continue leaving after the G.O.A.T. but Susie huffed in anger and stopped her. “Y’know I’m real tired of your little attitude _freak,_ Who do you think you are?” 

“I don’t think I’m anyone, but me Susie.”

“Ariel! Hey, come on let's go eat.” Amata was there for the rescue. Not that she really needed it. Ariel didn’t mind mopping the floor with Susie.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


“What’re we doing for your birthday?” Christine asks and Amata nodded her head. 

“Yeah, we gotta make sure it's perfect!” Amata says writing down on her notepad.

“Last year it was ruined by those idiots that got drunk for their grad party.” _Ah yes._

Ariel cringed remembering her birthday last year. James gave her the freedom to finally plan her own birthday and it was pretty stingy. She didn’t really care for a party this year.  
  


“Maybe I don’t _want_ to have a party this year?” Ariel was visibly uncomfortable, tracing the ridges on the buttons of her PipBoy.

Amata sighed with a head shake. “Oh come on you don’t mean that..” 

“A great thing happened on your birthday-- _You_ came into this world.” Ariel knew her friends meant well. Christine had said that so kindly without knowing Ariel that well, so she knew Chris wasn’t saying that with sarcasm. 

Ariel watched the way Amata must’ve squeezed her girlfriends hand under the table after she said that since Christine’s low pain tolerance came through when she murmured a small ‘ow’.

“I really do appreciate what you guys are trying to do, but I **really** don’t want anything for my birthday,” Christine’s frown leaned to the side before she spoke. “Not even a sweetroll?” That made Ariel purse her lips to stop the small smile, but she let it through. “I wouldn’t be perturbed if a sweetroll just so happened to be dropped off to my quarters.” 

“But for real.. I gotta finish studying for the G.O.A.T coming up- I don’t want to miss a thing.”

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


_I can’t believe I stressed over the exam when it’s only ten questions…_

“Would you look at that! Apparently, you’re Overseer material Ariela.” Mr. Brotch said and Ariel’s entire being was vibrated with fear at the thought. There was no way she could lead the Vault, she wanted to keep to herself and just give her bright inventions to others-- **Out** of the spotlight.

“There’s no way- Mr. Brotch that _has_ to be wrong I-” Mr. Brotch could see the panic in her eyes and the attack threatening to come out to the surface. The Ibriham family was bright. He knew Ariela would find her place in the Vault someday, and he also knew how much she excelled in STEM so he changed the results.

“Oh! Silly me, it’s seems I graded the exam wrong- You actually may have a place in our Vault’s STEM branch. The details are tricky, but I’m sure you’ll find your place in the Vault.”

_My place in the Vault._


	5. swimming in truth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ariel goes for a swim to clear her mind and butch joins her

Ariel had already finished all her homework, and finished the last chapter of the novel she was reading. Reading. She loved to do it, despite how much she hated having to write assignments and read aloud in class. Reading in her head by far was the best. No, judgements from the outside from how she said the words or read it in her own way. Her own bubble. 

But then she was reminded of earlier in the day. When Ms. Armstrong asked her to read aloud about a man who was assassinated and furthered the reason for war in Europe, she just about almost had an anxiety attack despite the silence. Gave her even more anxiety when it was just her voice echoing in the classroom and people’s sneering silence. 

Ariel stuffed her face in her pillow and groaned. She could go for something cool. To get her mind off things. She grabbed her knapsack and stuffed her towel inside and the novel she stole from Ms. Armstrongs collection.  _ “The Restless Hearts” _

Taking her makeshift lock pick and her bag she was out the door, watching around for Officer Mack. Her plan had almost gone to shit when she’d knocked over the cleaning stand the janitor was using to clean the bathrooms and looked around for the janitor to catch her and report her for sneaking out. 

But then she spotted the janitor peacefully working on the bathrooms and was pleased to find he was singing to himself with the radio faintly in the background.

_ Thank god Mr. Perez is hard of hearing.  _

_ ‘Cien anos’ His voice sounds just like Pedro Infante… _

Moving on she quickly made her way through the Atrium shortcut and made her way down to the pool level. Unbeknownst of who was behind her.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Butch was bored out of his mind in bed and buzzed, thinking if he could sneak into the diner and snag some more beer or watch a movie on the television on mute. Anything for some kind of fun around here.

When he’d heard the sound of someone busting ass in the hallway, he found himself peeping through his window to see what the ruckus was all about. Ariel- sneaking around- terribly. If she wanted to be a sneak she could’ve just came to the Butch-man and they would’ve already been at their destination. 

_ Who would’ve thought little goody-goody… _

_ This should be a juicy story to get them off the gangs back--  _

Grabbing his jacket quickly he picked up her trail and followed her, not after snooping on Mr. Perez and chuckling to himself when he saw him doing the bachata with his mop. 

He’d realized she was going to the pool level when he spotted her taking a shortcut to avoid Stevie on his shift, she was something else. Though the how of how she was going to get into the pool level was beyond him till he saw her pull out some gadget and started opening the lock on the door like a pro. 

_ Didn’t know she was so good with her hands-- Oh shit I lost her--  _

Butch descended from the top entry way towards the pool and peeped around the corner and saw she was already in the water. Good thing he had a little something to get through doors others might not have. 

“What are you doing down here young lady?” He announced after shutting the door behind him. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Ariel threw her knapsack down and neatly folded her vault suit to the side before tying her hair back with a banana clip she was given a few years ago for her birthday. 

After dipping into the clear cool water she could feel her troubles leaving through her budded skin. To anyone else a hot shower would feel better, but the cool water staved off her nerves.

Beginning to float in the water she let out a sigh of relief and started to let her mind drift till she heard a muffled,  **_“What’re you doing down here, young lady!”_ ** With a gasp she shot up expecting to see her worst nightmare- but it was just Butch. 

_ Thank god it wasn’t him.  _

“B-Butch keep it down! How’d you know I was down here?” She whispered-yelled, swimming towards the corner of the pool he was standing at. 

Butch bent down to be eye level with her and barked a laugh, but she’d pressed her hand over his mouth and shushed him. “Butch!” 

“ **Mm-Mm.”** Ariel groaned, “I don’t think I can trust—  _ Ew!”  _ He licked her hand and she quickly submerged her hand to wipe his saliva off her.

“Said I was sorry toots.” He smiled at her and stood back up, Ariel watched him remove his jacket and throw it by her things hidden behind a bench, though once she’d realized he was removing his Vault suit she blushed to herself and looked away. 

“You never answered my question..” 

Butch dipped his toes in the water and she heard him make his way towards her in the water. 

“What was the question?” Ariel turned around and was able to get a good look at him, despite it being the weekend he looked tired and smelled like—  _ alcohol.  _

“How’d you know I was coming down here?” 

“How  _ didn’t  _ I know. You almost woke the whole neighborhood when you knocked over Perez’ trolley,” He joked and she splashed water his way, “I didn’t mean to do that..” 

“Yeah I can tell,” 

“So what’s your plan… You gonna blackmail me or something?” Butch shook his head and found himself reaching out to stroke some curls off her cheek that had stuck there. 

“Nah.. That’d be less fun,” Ariel punched his shoulder lightly but he winced like she had the strength of Grognak. 

“I didn’t even hit you that hard…” Butch gave her a goofy smile and the laugh that followed almost made her join him, it’d been years since she heard him laugh like that. 

“M’just messin’ with you…” He leaned into her personal space and played with the close to frayed ends. 

_ She needs a haircut- STAT!  _

_ I swear if she goes to Van,  _

_ she won’t hear the last of it from me.. _

“Did I tell you, you look real beautiful in the pool light Ariel?” He knew flattery never went to her head. No matter how much he liked to say things to her. Ariel would always brush it off or— 

“What’re you…” Butch started as Ariel placed both her hands on his bare chest and leaned in close, close enough to kiss her. His hands were floating in the water, waiting for a message to be sent to them and they were practically screaming to jump and hold her by the hips. Just as he’d gotten the courage to lean in and close that dizzying space she leaned back, simultaneously pushing against his chest to give her enough space to look in his eyes. 

“Have you been drinking Butch?...” 

She expected a lie, or for him to crack a joke and avert from the problem but he nodded his head. 

“Yeah.” Ariel knew that look, she’d only seen it a few times. When his Father died. After his Mother started— getting worse. After the step in James had to do after he’d seen how he was acting in his day to day. Butch needed help, but he never  _ wanted  _ it. But he always accepted it from her and it in some way made her feel… Useful. James used her to get information about his health so he could help him, but in the end she’d grown closer to Butch and well— They were friends. Maybe. 

_ Sort of… Not really friends. I don’t know. _

“Y’know what I do to feel better?” 

When he looked into her eyes all he saw was a photo he wanted to hang over his bed and show everyone that came in his room. 

“What’d’you do princess?” The nickname just slipped out of his mouth, having used it so many times to taunt her. He realized how correct the term was after all. 

  
  


“I uhm..”

_ Princess?!  _ One side of her complained. 

_ Princess…  _ The other melted into a daze.

_ Susie…  _

“Well I swim down here,” He noticed her backstroke towards the middle of the pool and he followed her, his feet never leaving the ground as the waters rose to his chest and she went a-float. Doe eyes looking right into his, The green in her eye shining brighter in the blue-tinted light. If only he was as articulate with his mouth as he was on paper. 

“I was gonna say we should swim together, but I know how you feel about your  _ hair.”  _

“If you wanted me wet, that’s all you had to say girl.” The innuendo went over her head, but swung back around like a boomerang and had her blushing like an idiot. To hide it she grabbed him by the shoulders and took him under water with her by force. 

Once they’d come back up for air he swept his hair back and coughed, “ _ Christ _ , them little arms of yours must be hiding Grognak's muscles in there,” Ariel entertained his thoughts and nodded her head, flexing her not so much there muscles. 

“Gee Ari, what’s your workout routine? I oughta learn a few things from you,” He playfully grabbed at her arm and felt it up like he was admiring her muscles and she snorted shoving him toward the kitty end of the pool so she could stand. 

“My secret is my diet…” 

“Oh  _ really _ ? What is that?” Butch lowered himself to float knee level to be eye level with her. 

Ariel wiped a few droplets off her face that almost went into her eyes before continuing, “I’m on a seafood diet.” The shit eating grin she had on her face let him know there was a punchline to it, but his buzzed self analyzed the seafood part.

“Seafood? We don’t have seafood.” Ariel looked like she was about to burst out laughing before she could get the punchline in, and he found himself copying her smile. 

“Yeah! Any food I see, I eat!” Butch found it a  _ little _ funny. He’d heard it before from Officer Taylor, but the way she’d gotten so hyped up about it made him bark a laugh and it made her laugh even harder. 

“Oh my gosh Butch- Your laugh- I- I can’t!” 

**_“I swear I heard voices down here Officer Gomez!”_ **

_ Oh nonono-  _

**_“You couldn’t have checked yourself Mack?”_ **

Ariel was in no way getting caught she yanked Butch by his arms and pulled him as close as possible. Hiding them both underneath the pool cover roller. At least Butch had enough sense to know it wasn’t play time anymore, and if they really were caught they’d have their hides- maybe not Butch’s as much but most indefinitely Ariel’s. Her Father would take away her privileges and materials she liked to build with, quite possibly even take her away her BB gun area.

“This is ridiculous Stevie. You can’t keep asking me to come with you to search dark areas in the Vault. There’s nothing down here.” Officer Gomez had just flashed his light over the water a few times and Ariel squeezed them even further into the corner, and unknowingly held him tighter against her chest. Ears heightened and filled with nothing but the Officers voices and footsteps around the pool. Butch knew if they did the whole pool perimeter or went any further they’d see their belongings, and be blue-balled for who knows how long. So he started coming up with excuses in his head for them——

“Gomez. I swear I heard strange voices down here, I wouldn’t—“ Stevie was looking around haphazardly, staying right behind Gomez in fear something would jump out at him. 

“I think you ought to get some sleep Stevie.” Gomez sighed with exasperation and turned his light off. “Chief Hannon should be alright with it if I cover your shift. Now come on kid.” 

With that he could hear their steps against the tiled floor and walk out onto the concrete ones outside as the door shut behind them. 

_ That was too close. I’ve never been almost caught before. I’m always quiet- in and out. Butch-  _

“You alright? You’re shakin’ like a tissue with a little boogie in it..” 

Ariel rolled her eyes a little, suddenly angry with him for bringing such a close call to them.   
“ _ I’m  _ alright, are you? I don’t want my already restricted privileges to get taken away-”

“Oh so what, you act like your Father gave you permission to make that lockpick and come down here. Just break the rules. Who cares?” He frowned when she swam away from him, letting the cool water touch his skin where she once had. 

“ _ I  _ care. I’m not you Butch, I have a bunch of stupid expectations to follow. I have to set an example for the younger kids, and you-” Butch laughed incredulously and she Ariel stopped in her tracks, and sighed with a head shake.  _ Nothing’s ever expected of him, but I’m sure he wished there was.  _

“I know. Trust me I know. But you gotta have some fun, some thrill!  _ This  _ is all we’ve got Ariel- for the rest of our lives..” There was an apology in there. Whether she liked it or not. 

“Do you really believe theres nothing for us out there?” Ariel’s question was one he’d thought of himself as well, was it really all gone out there? Were they going to always be in the Vault. Born in the Vault, Die in the Vault. 

“Who knows…” Butch laughed but it was empty as he continued, “My Ma, she was drunk the other day.. Told me the old man wasn’t my Father after all, was my grandfather.  _ Her  _ Father.” He wasn’t looking at her just their hands floating in the water in front of them both.

“I don’t know what’s the truth anymore.” Ariel didn’t know what to say really, or if she should say something even. What do you even say to that? 

So she did what she knew best and gave him a hug, “M’sorry I.. Shit I’m always telling you things I shouldn’t,” Butch peeled himself out of the hug and was too busy sulking to realize how close he was to the dame. 

“There’s nothing wrong with telling me things--”

“I know, I know, but you never tell me anything about  **you** .” Butch wanted to know more about her and it wasn’t just the simple things, he knew all the simple shit already. Even through the little notes he’d written her, the ones she’d write back were vague and guarded. But he guessed it could’ve been because he wasn’t telling who the sender of the letters were. So it was a mystery and even as a mystery she wasn’t opening up to him. 

“There’s nothing to really know about me Butch-” 

“That's a load of bullshit.” Butch’s face was soured and Ariel was left thinking of how they even got to this topic.

“I want you to tell me things, tell me things you’d never tell anybody- I want you to  _ trust _ me Ariel.” Butch was wearing his heart on his sleeve and was trying his best to show that. Ariel knew how bad he was at doing that. 

“I know about your falling out with Amata and stuff and I just--” 

“You  _ what? _ ” Something snapped in her when he brought that up, he wasn’t wrong. Yeah Amata and Ariel had a falling out. The closer she’d gotten to Butch the farther Amata started pushing her away; even Christine noticed it and was being pushed away as well. Chris came to her that same week, asking if her and Amata were secretly a thing. Almost even got into a fight with Chris because she thought Ariel stole Amata from her. Despite the label between the girls being non-apparent. 

“What happened with Amata is old news, she just.. I don’t know,” She shrugged realizing she didn’t actually know where the outlash came from. 

“Was mad with me.. I thought that, I thought she was happy with how things were but she just; Amata wasn’t happy with how things were and I still don’t really know what I did.” She licked her dry lips and did a weird nod of exception.

“I haven’t talked to her in weeks.” 

Butch already knew everything that happened, but hearing it from the main source made him feel bad he didn’t ask her about the situation first. Christine told Susie who told Wally who told Butch and he- well he told who he always had to tell.. Now he was regretting it. 

“I don’t think she meant whatever she said to you, I never did..” Ariel wiped at her eyes and he awkwardly tucked her hair out of the way. “It’ll be fine. You’ve got all the time in the world to make up with her.” 

“You’re right… All the time, All the time in the world.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> its about to go down... expect another post in a few min- i didn't want to put the whole thing in one chapter.... :))


	6. escape!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ariel is woken up by an assailant, and has to figure out what to do before making her escape from the vault.

Ariel groggily woke up, sounds muffled as she tried to regain consciousness. Something was happening, she could hear banging on her bedroom door and finally opened her eyes to look around her room. 

**_Come outta there! Now!_ **

It was muffled but then she finally heard it- ears finally clearing from the hissing in her head; the alarm system could be heard. The voice now crystal clear. 

“If you don’t open this door then I’m forced to raise my hand!” With a shocked gasp she got up from her bed, legs wobbly as she ran to her desk, as she did so her bedroom door opened and in came Officer Kendall. Baton in hand and headed her way. Out of self defense she grabbed her baseball bat and swung at his side. Watching him hit the floor with a groan.

“S-Stop what are you doing! I- I don't want to hurt you, you’re my best friends Father!” 

The Officer recoiled a little as he rose his baton up again and took a step back. 

“Fine. I’ll let you go for now. But I won’t be as forgiving if I see you again.” The man said before rushing out and heading to God knows where.  
  
Completely discombobulated she nervously put her bat down and ran into her Father’s room. 

“Daddy! Are you okay? Officer Ken--” Upon opening the door she noticed the room was disheveled. Bed undone, drawers left open, things haphazardly thrown on the ground. 

_Where did he go?_

_Maybe he’s helping patients! Yeah-_

As she was about to go back to bed she noticed a holotape next to her bedside. It was marked for her. To her. 

Sliding it into her Pipboy it played. A message. She heard her Father’s voice. Heard the pain in it as he said **_good-bye._ **

_Daddy left me?_

Ariel knew she was wasting precious time processing his message, over and over again. But she knew she needed to leave- Especially after what Officer Kendall did. If her Father could leave so could she.

Grabbing her backpack she put her necessities inside. Being a neat person was her biggest ally as she packing her things and once she was sure she had it all, she grabbed her BB gun and ran out of her room. Grabbing packaged food in the cabinets before making her way to the door- though that’s when she spotted it, the photo of her and her Father on her 10th birthday. 

_What did I do wrong? Why did you leave me behind?_

Stuffing it into her backpack she moved on. Heading straight to the halls after finding the door to Vault B was inaccessible. “There she is- Hold it right there!” 

_Hell to the fucking no._

Quickly she took a shortcut through the bathrooms trying to lose Officer Mack aka that creepy looney Stevie before he could catch her- but he grabbed at her ponytail and dragged her. 

“Lemme go! Lemme-- **MM**!” He put his slimy hand over her mouth and kept dragging her till he threw her on the ground. 

“It’s over girlie, there ain’t no escaping this.” He let her crawl away, trying to get back to her feet, only to realize it was his mistake when she swung the butt of her BB gun at him. Knocking him out- 

As quick as she could she threw him in a bathroom stall and ran off, not before taking his 10mm pistol of course. If anyone that had the same anger as Stevie and the like mind to just kill her- and not watch her squirm like a freak. They would’ve shot her point blank. 

Though as she ran off she bumped into someone rounding the corner, screaming when they grabbed her. “Stop!--“

“Woah hey- It’s me, It’s me!” Butch’s voice was shaking and as she realized who it was nothing but relief filled her. 

“Please you’ve gotta help me! My mom is trapped in there with the Radroaches!” Butch says and almost immediately Ariel bolted into action.

“Wait- Radroaches!?”

“T-They’re everywhere! I- And the lights went out in there and I- Shit! I don’t do good with bugs okay- but please we’re wasting time please help me get her outta there!” Butch put his hands on her hips as he got on his knees and begged her. 

Of course she helped him. How could she not? He was her friend after all. Despite how many years went by when they weren’t. 

After she’d helped Ellen up from the corner of the room on top of Butch’s desk to get some height away from the damned things, she offered Ariel a drink.

“Wow, that was crazy huh? Why don’t you sit down and have a drink hun?” Butch was more than happy to see his Mother okay, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t aggravated with her. 

“You did it! My God- She’s gonna be okay!” Pulling her into a bear hug he lifted the girl off the ground before putting her back down. "Ma-! She don't want a drink- go lay down," Ariel shyly folded into herself as she was put back down.

“I don’t know how I can- Oh! Here, take this okay?” Butch removed his beloved jacket and put it in her hands. Watching as she put it in her backpack- which he didn’t question at the time- though he wished he did. 

“Thank you Butch... “ She smiled sweetly before remembering she was on the clock. 

“I.. I have to get going Butch,” 

“Right! Right- Stay safe please- Really. Gotta make sure my Ma is alright.” 

“I will. I promise.” Butch watched her go, heart sinking as she left- he should’ve walked her back home. Followed her. Done something.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


As she was leaving her level she passed the diner, spotting Grandma Palmer on the ground along with Ms. Taylor. It broke her a little- she didn’t even have time to process it as a whole hoard came out from the booths and tried to attack her.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


“We gotta get outta here Baby, these guys are fuckin’ sickos. If the Doc got outta this shit hole so can we-” 

“But Joe, you know what they did to that poor man- what if they do that to us?” 

Joe was about to tell her they wouldn’t do that to them, but Van spotted Ariel entering the Atrium. 

“Ariela! Jesus- we thought they hurt you or somethin’” She says and Ariel almost cried when she saw they were both okay. 

“We’re breakin’ outta here Van and I-”

“No, no- I really don’t think that’s a good idea, Joe,” Ariel says and Van nodded her head in agreement. 

_“See_ even she agrees with me, we should go back to our quarters and stop dwelling on our break-out plan. Who knows what the hell is even out there anyways!” Van pulled Joe towards their stairway home and asked if Ariel wanted to come as well. But she kindly declined and watched them as they went. Sighing with relief as she realized they could’ve gotten gunned down by the Officers for no good reason. She knew this as a fact since they opened fire on her when she crossed the Atrium. Using her homemade lockpick she jammed the door behind her to stop them from getting to her. 

Though as she made her way to The Overseer’s office she spotted him inside the interrogation room with Amata and that bastard. He must’ve taken a shortcut to get there.

Ariel would have minded her business knowing her Father would never hurt her, but then Stevie took his weapon out, “Now where is she, Amata? Officer Mack may enjoy this, but I don’t. I don’t want to have him hurt you.” 

_Oh, these sick bastards!_

Ariel ran into the room and stopped Stevie pushing him away from Amata.

“Get away from her, you monster!” 

The Overseer watched the whole ordeal, even watched his daughter flee somewhere. Waiting for Stevie to finish the job and off that runt little girl. 

Ariel didn’t want to kill him. Didn’t want to pull the trigger, but she knew it was either him or her- knew he took pleasure in hurting people- she knew because he’d done it before. 

Rolled his lifeless body off her and stood up shakily, looking at his body lie lifeless on the ground. “My gosh I- Oh my-” 

“See? You’re a monster! Look at what you did, killed an Officer who was only defending his leader! Protecting his daughter!” Ariel almost believed what he said, almost believed she didn’t do the right thing. 

“No! You ordered him to hurt her- you said you didn’t want him to hurt her, but you would have let him- You’re the sick one. Just like him.” 

“Where do you think you’re going young lady?” 

“I’m leaving, and if you try to stop me- I’ll- I’ll hurt Amata too!” She lies through her teeth, but he believed her and even recoiled in fear. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Ariel ran off to find Amata- knowing even if they weren’t on good terms she needed to see her one last time. And apologize. 

“Amata! Ama--” Turning the corner she gasped at the sight and put a hand over her mouth, “Oh no… no, no, no-” Getting on her knees she shook him by the shoulder a little trying to get him to move. “Jonas come on- come on- we can escape together and find Daddy- please get up Jonas- please-” 

“He’s dead Ariela…” Amata came out of her quarters, red eyed and wiping her face with the back of her hands. “I tried to go get you- and help you- but my Father trapped me in the interrogation room-” Her heart was breaking by the second. 

“M’sorry Amata- I’m so sorry-” Ariel thought Amata was going to hug her but she pushed her arms away. 

“Why didn’t you leave with your Father? Haven’t you caused enough pain?” Ariel couldn’t believe her ears. 

“What.. No I- I didn’t k-” 

“You Father wasn’t from the Vault. Neither were you. And all you did was drag your problems into the Vault and _now_ look at everything! You hurt me, hurt Officer Mack, got Jonas killed--”

“I didn’t know goddamnit!” Ariel suddenly yelled and pushed past Amata. Using the key she got from her Father after lying to him, and entered his office. Entering the code ‘A-M-A-T-A’. 

Amata followed her, still fuming with anger and other emotions Amata wished she would fucking read. 

“Y’know what- I’m sorry Amata- I don’t know what I ever did to you, but I’m sorry okay! I thought we were best friends- I thought you cared about me- I thought-” 

“I-I loved you, you idiot! For years! And you never once bat an eye my way, even when I said I liked Christine- or when I told you I didn’t like you hanging around Butch-” It all made sense now- why she was so adamant she stopped being friends with Butch. But it was all too late now. The damage was already done, and there was no way she could live here. Without Jonas, Palmer, her Father. 

“Amata-”

“No dammit, listen to me! I wanted to be your girlfriend ever since you told me freshman year you might like girls- I thought that girl was me! I thought you loved me too- sure made it seem like it-” 

“Amata. I love you- I do- but never like that… I never meant to hurt you- I thought-” 

“Oh and Butch?” She laughed in her face, “He was using you. Didn’t you know? Butch and his little Tunnel Snakes were actually rats.” Amata was filled with satisfaction when her face fell. 

“Yeah. Butch? He was reporting anything and everything he heard to my Father. **_Everything._ **” Amata pointed at her Fathers terminal, “Don’t believe me? Read my Father’s file on them.” Amata walked off after that with a broken smile on her face, but Ariel didn’t see the way she held in her cries and locked herself in her quarters to mourn losing her friend- 

_So it is true… No one was ever on my side._

Without a second guess she opened up the secret entrance and headed out, not after grabbing the photo off Jonas’ desk and his glasses.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


With shaky hands she inserted the key to the Vault attached to her Pip-Boy and watched as it opened. The entrance was dark, and muddied. Rocks all over. Seemed about right. They were in a mountain after all. There were all kinds of emotions running through her at once as she watched the door fully slide open. 

_I can’t stay here. I really can’t. I was right. There is no place for me here. Never was…_

With one last look back, for any kind of motivation to stay she realized no one wanted her here. Even Butch. It made her cry as she walked out. Processing every moment in the Vault leading up to this moment as she approached the old raggedy doorway to the outside. What really hit her was the door being shut behind her. And the cold white noise surrounded her. 

As soon as she stepped outside she covered her eyes, wincing at the bright sun as it beamed down on her. 

Now she needed to find her Father. And find herself. Her place in the world. 

Before it chewed her up and spit her out like the Vault.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the ball is a-rolling!


	7. would've, should've, could've

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hii im having a lot of fun with this in all honesty and i hope this chapter isnt too confusing with the flashbacks and back to present kind of thing going on. 
> 
> im gonna try doing that for a while and also try and do perspectives by Butch as well as maybe even Amata and Christines ;)

Things had finally died down. Everyone was still in their homes as The Overseer had security do some kind of clean up of all the radroaches and dead bodies from the infestation. 

But he knew some of them were from security going crazy- some of them showed that day they were power mongrels. Sadistic bastards killed poor Chip, he was just scared and wanted to be with his Mother. So he ran past them despite them scaring him, and they gunned him down. 

_Who could gun down a child? An unarmed child. A child_. 

Lockdown was so tight he couldn’t even go see if she was alright in her quarters. 

Ariel was all he could think about as they finally cleared everyone to leave their quarters and enter the Atrium so everyone could be addressed. 

**“** **_After our encounter with the Radroach infestation, I have taken all precautions to avoid any further encounters with them again. As for the people, we have lost that day to Radroaches. May we have a moment of silence for them..”_ **Butch couldn’t focus on what was being said as he looked around the crowd for Ariel. He couldn’t find her. Looking from the front to the back. Nowhere— 

**_“As for the unloyal residents that went against the Vault’s rules, and left the Vault when we were at our most vulnerable. Ariel Ibriham has gotten what she deserved. An exile. To never be welcomed back. As for the others who were involved. The death penalty by Officer Mack to Jonas Palmer who had helped James Ibriham and leave the Vault. And reek even more havoc onto us all. Our security has done us a great service. Now everyone, let us get back to work and continue our routines.”_ **

_No… No way she’s gone- there’s no way she left. Without saying goodbye? She couldn’t have—_

“Amata? Can I talk to you please?” 

“What.” Amata crossed her arms over her chest and sighed shakily. He could tell she’d been crying. 

“Is she really gone? Is Ariel really gone?” Amata made a face when he said her name like he had a right to. 

“Yeah. She had to go anyway. Do you really think anyone wanted to keep her hereafter what her Father pulled?” Butch couldn’t believe she was saying that about her dear friend. 

“Did she bring me up? D-Did she—“ 

Amata was heartbroken, and in that state, she lashed it out onto Butch. 

“No, she was too busy trying to leave to care to say goodbye.” 

Butch nodded his head, trying to understand things. At the moment though he was a little mad even. 

“You know, you're a no-good bastard. I know about how you and your little Tunnel Snakes were really just glorified rats. I _knew_ you never really were her friend, just using her to get information on her Father. Guess it never worked since this whole shit show happened." 

Butch shook his head. That was the last straw for him. 

“You shut your damn mouth. You don’t know _anything_. I never **_dared_** tell him anything about her. Never. She trusted me with things, things even _you_ didn’t know.” He walked off after that, completely distraught as he went to his level and ran straight to her quarters. Finding it was already opened. 

_If she knew. It's so possible Ariel found out as well--_

Everything was the way it was. Except for when he got a peep into James’ bedroom. It was a damned mess. Looking into the kitchen he could see the wrappers from the sweet rolls they were making together a few nights ago. When James was working and she knew he wouldn’t be back for hours. 

Butch came over. With all the ingredients, they baked the goodies and watched a scary movie while it was being made. 

His eyes glossed over to the couch. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**“I can’t stand gore when I’m eatin’, friggin’ gross I tell you.” Ariel knew he was exaggerating his accent and pushed him playfully.**

**Ariel spoke with a smile.**

**“Stop~! I’m** **_trying_** **to focus on the movie Butch,” He did anything to make her smile at him. To look at him. At this point, he was a feign for it.**

**“Yeah, yeah, sorry Ari.” After stretching his arms out he found himself slyly putting his arm around her, and was glad when she leaned her head against him.**

**While they-** **_he_ ** **was cleaning the dishes she hauled herself up onto the counter and watched him. Swinging her feet back and forth as they spoke about... Something he couldn’t quite remember the topic. But he remembered she was teasing him about something.**

**“Oh yeah? You think you’re tough cause you’re eye level with me?” Butch didn’t mean to do it, but he put his hands on her. Not in a fighting way- but a playful one. Brushed his hand under her chin and the way she goofily laughed and had smiled with rosy cheeks, let him know she might’ve liked that.**

**So he kept going. “Them cute feet of yours don’t even touch the floor when you sit up here,” Butch playfully pinched at her slipper covered toes and it made her flinch so hard her slipper flew off, and it threw her in a fit of laughs when she saw it landed atop the stove. He looked over his shoulder at it then at her and saw she was covering her eyes as she laughed. Putting the baking pan away next to the sink, he took her slipper off the stovetop, still dawning a smile as he slid the slipper back onto her foot like it was a glass slipper.**

**“You’re eye level with me and won’t even look at me.” Butch’s hands were on either side of her, palms flat on the countertop, as he leaned down a bit to catch her eyes in his.**

**“I always am..” Ariel was blushing and he knew he was too after she’d said it, “You just never notice when I do..”**

**Butch licked over his lips and nervously tried to lean in, but then he stopped himself instead swiping her hair to lay behind her back. “You saying I’m oblivious or somethin’?” Ariel shrugged and nervously swiped her own thumb over her lips.**

**“Maybe…” He could tell she was holding her breath, especially when she’d exhaled as shakily as he did. Butch was just about to tease her about it when she brushed his stray curl out of his face.**

**“You don’t notice a lot of things I do…”**

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Butch was in her room now, remembering their almost kiss. If he took the chance and kissed her then. He would’ve kissed her twice. Then maybe more. Maybe enough for her to tell him- Tell him she was leaving that day. Tell him maybe to come with him… 

_No. No, I never could’ve left Ma- Not when she needed me most._

It was a lot of ‘what if’s’ in his head as he looked at her bed. Then his heart sank, even more, when he laid in her bed. 

_She took Mr. Cuddlebuns... Took my jacket. I hope she kept them. I hope my jackets keeping her warm- God I hope she’s alive out there._

_Fuck me- Why didn’t I stop her- Why didn’t I-_

He slammed his fist against her nightstand and recoiled when a drawer snapped out of place. Guilt filled him as he realized he’d broken her belongings. 

_Even when she’s not here I’m an angry asshole._

He thought as he tried to slide it back into place, though after so many tries he gave up and was about to slam it shut but noticed something inside it. A book he’d seen her write in before… 

James must’ve told her journaling was healthy as well, he did it as well for a little in middle school but stopped. Butch wondered if it was wrong to even be in here, but The Overseer said it himself, she was _exiled_. 

Putting the book back in her drawer he closed it softly and eyed the big carpet on the floor. The one Bessie gave her. 

_Oh, man Bessie... I should see how the lady is doing._

The carpet had memories… One's he’d forgotten about. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


He couldn’t remember how old he was. But he knew he was a year older than Ariel despite being in the same grade. So he guessed this was middle school. 

**“Read more Butchie..” Ariel said wiping her eyes with the back of her hands before laying her head back down on Mr. Cuddlebunz**

**“Kay’ so, the birdie said, ‘I think we should fly high and meet the stars.’ and the hare said. ‘But I can’t fly, I’m a hare!’ But the birdie had this look on em’ like he knew somethin’, So he says, ‘Why I’ll carry you in a basket and fly with you.’”**

Butch’s memory of the story was a little vague since it’d been so long ago, but he remembered it kind of. 

He was staying over at the Ibriham residence, just ate dinner and he was reading a book to her. 

**“How come you don’t wanna read out loud?” Butch asks as they decide to stop there and continue it later.**

**“I..” Butch flinched when she put her hand out, pinky outstretched towards him.**

**“Promise you won’t tell anyone?”**

**Butch pinky swore** **_and_ ** **crossed his heart. Showing how serious he was and the smile of relief she gave him made him feel a little giddy.**

**“I have trouble with it, Daddy says it’s some kind of mental thing... I-I can read but I just- It’s hard to read out loud.“ Butch understood her; gave her a head nod for extra measure.**

**“It’s okay,” Ariel smiled even wider when he’d said. “I’ll read to you whenever you want Ari.”**

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Butch didn’t mean to fall asleep in her bed, found himself pressing his face deeper into her pillow as her scent oddly enough lingered in her bed. She always smelled like peppermint since they had so much of it. He guessed the people making the Vault hundreds of years ago put a surplus of peppermint extract. Turned out she played with chemicals and mimicked the scent. 

Processing it in his head, he wondered what was out there. Wondered if she was safe. Rolling onto his back he put his hands over his eyes feeling the ache behind them, starting the waterworks soon. 

_I don’t deserve to cry over her…_

_Please be okay…_

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


“Oh, sweetheart. Did I say 100 caps? I meant 500 caps,” Moriarity says with that nasty smile at Ariel. She shook her head in disbelief, “No, no, you said 100 caps and I have it now! I-I don’t know where I’m supposed to get that much more- getting 100 was already difficult.” Ariel was running out of ideas, 

“I got an idea of how you could pay me, young lass, meet me upstairs in my room and I’ll show ya.” 

Moriarity brushed against her purposely as he went to his room and Ariel was vibrating in disgust and anger as she watched him go. Tears threatening to stream down her face. 

“Hey kid, come here.” It was Gob that said that. “Listen I’m usually not allowed to go back there, but I think he might have some info on your Father if you can get into it that is. You didn’t hear it from me though!” He whispered the last part and continued wiping the tables clean. 

“Oh, Thank you Gob!” She let out a few happy tears and gave him a big hug to which he responded awkwardly to of course. 

“Now make sure he doesn't see you do it kid alright.” 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Gob was right, there was information on her Father on the terminal, Ariel was thankful that she had so much experience with terminals that it was almost child’s play getting into his terminal. 

All she knew now was that he was at some radio station with the owner Three Dog. But from what Nova and Gob say it was a warzone, and it wasn’t just the super mutants and Brotherhood she needed to watch for. She was thankful for them. Gob even traded some pre-war money for caps and gave her a little more to work with. 

Ariel needed more than a 10mm pistol and a BB gun. She was able to get the job done but, she knew they wouldn’t be dropping dead from her BB pellets that she was running out of. 

_Leaving at night is a terrible idea…_

_I should take a look at the bomb that man told me about._

Ariel had seen schematics like this before. They were the ones built into the bombs that were dropped on Nagasaki and Hiroshima that they learned about in class-- Of course they weren’t taught the schematics, but out of sheer curiosity she searched the archives and found information on the missiles. Guess the curiosity in itself was a huge win for her. 

Especially since it landed in getting her, her own home in Megaton. 

Course the place was empty apart from Mr. Handy and the bed from the previous owner. Not that she was complaining about hand-me-downs. Anything but the cold floor in the abandoned school, with the half-broken door barricaded, was better than that. 

_Guess the previous owner wasn’t a believer in some blankets.. Jeez._

_No blankets! Ugh, whatever, I’ll get some later- wish I knew how to sew.._

_Wish Butch--- Butch!_

She sat up from the bed with a gasp of realization and ran straight to her bag by the door and opened it. Ariel had almost forgotten she had it in her pack. 

_His jacket…_

Ariel frowned to herself while eyeing the leather. 

_Was it all really fake? Was he really-- No, no, there’s no way he wasn’t just using me. Amata was right. He just wanted another conquest struck off his list, just wanted to appease the Overseer by telling him everything I ever told him._

She still wore it though. Wrapped herself up in it and laid down. 

Ariel could faintly smell his cologne and hair gel, even could smell that weird bland clean smell the Vault had.

_Can’t believe he always lied to me… I should’ve told him I saw the project in his terminal._

_Maybe I could’ve left with him._

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**James was tired. Pouring himself into his work every night was beginning to really drag on him. But after talking to Jonas he realized how much he’d been neglecting their relationship, and that he needed to reinforce it and make sure she knew he loved her. He was just getting- caught up in work and was getting somewhere, and was so close that he couldn’t stop now. James knew she would understand once he explained it.**

**But that wasn’t now. Not yet. James knew she wasn’t Daddy’s little girl anymore. She didn’t need him to live in the Vault, and there was no way she was coming with him when he leaves. Somehow.**

**Entering her bedroom he noticed she was actually awake, working with the material he bought her for her seventeenth birthday.**

**James gently kicked her chair to grab her attention and she whipped around, “Huh-- Oh, hi Daddy,” Ariel sat back down shutting her radio off as she removed the headset she had on.**

**“I have some warm milk for you,” He says, setting the table down, getting a good look at her work so far, which was coming along as great as he could think. Energy weapons weren’t really his expertise.**

**“Thanks.” Her response was curt and short. No, ‘How was work?’ ‘How come you’re home so early?’**

**“I know I haven’t been home lately honey, but I’ll make it up to you. I’ll make some japchae tomorrow night. Finally, show you how to make it.**

**“Really?”**

**“‘Course sweetheart. Now get some sleep honey,” James said after placing a kiss on her head before going.**

**“And remember to wear your retainers.” He scolded to be funny more than anything, he knew she was responsible.**

**“Ye~ah I know Daddy.”**

  
  
  
  


**Once he’d left and she was sure he shut the door behind him she took out the note from her textbook. It was a thing she looked forward to at the end of every week. This secret admirer would leave her notes in her textbook all the time.**

_You held me_

_like a coffee cup_

_careful by the handle._

_You looked at me like the clocks stopped spinning and the universe halted._

_All things breathed around our stillness._

_To you it was chaste._

_But to me, it was a simple, blue, eternity._

_Yours truly..._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> phew wee, the butch man is in his feels and so is ariel :((


	8. going back with chills down their spine.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ariel gets a distress signal and has to go back to her old home...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: reference to past rape & attempted sexual assault, I put asterisks to when you can skip. it will be brought up in the next chapter as well! anything that is triggering will have a few asterisks before it takes place.
> 
> also this is a lil lengthy so i would grab a whittle snack like a lunchable or gummy snacks or smthn :) 
> 
> and i listened to songs while writing this and found myself listening to:  
> Gustavo Santaolalla i recommend listening in this order  
> longing  
> soft descent  
> the obsession  
> longing (redemptions)  
> It cant last (home)  
> the cycle continues  
> all gone (the promise)  
> allowed to be happy 
> 
> i like this chapter in all honesty and i hope u guys as well!

Butch found himself back in her room. Still the way she’d left it. 

After a few months, of course, he’d already known every crevice, every inch, every item in her room by now. The Overseer tried to have the room cleared out, wanted to send everything through the garbage chute, and have the quarters be given to the next new family. 

Butch knew she’d never see them. The notes he was writing to her. But he kept the tradition. Putting notes in her textbook at the end of the week. 

Even though he’d sort of, kind of, had gotten with Susie a few times over the past year when he was lonely. But he stopped once he realized that's all it was. There wasn’t anything real between them. 

Of course, life went on. His habits weren’t the best at least-- No, no, he _was_ kind of turning into his Father- Grandfather… But he could never be as bad as his Mother. Never could let himself ‘cause every time he so much as looked at a bottle he could hear her voice and it grounded him. Tempted him to the bottle to drown in his fantasies when the real world was too much to handle. 

**_“You're smarter than you let on.."_ **

**_“I like your hair like that, Butch, you look handsome.”_ **

**_“I will… I promise.”_ **

_Was that really the last thing she said to me?_

_No, no, before that…_

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


“What happened? Woah- hey-” Ariel pulled him into a hug rather aggressively, hidden from the eyes of others. She’d asked him to visit her over the intercom. Voice cracking like a damaged record of his favorite song. 

Butch listened to her when she said she wanted to be alone for her birthday, knew how much Father-Daughter time meant to her. Didn’t think intruding on her special day was right. Would give her, her present tomorrow. But she asked him to come, so he did. 

Once he realized she was crying he held her tight-- Originally keeping his arms to his side since he didn’t know what the hell was happening. But he was never good at the whole consoling thing so, when it came for him to do it for her it was a rough start while he got acclimated. 

Ariel spoke against his chest, “Just hold me… Please?” Butch was already doing that but he realized she wasn’t in the mood to chat. But he needed to move out of the doorway before any Officers caught him going in her quarters. 

“Yeah, of course… Just get inside alright,” Looking down at her tugged on his heartstrings, he couldn’t understand what she was so broken about. 

“You wanna tal--” Ariel shook her head while her face was against his chest, he’d be lying if he said it didn’t feel good to be needed for once. 

“Come on, let’s go sit or something- you’re shakin’ like you saw the boogeyman.” After a moment of silence, she deeply inhaled and brought him to her room, and once the door shut she was all over him again. Clinging to him like she was gonna disappear if she didn’t. 

“Please lay down with me.” _Woah. Woah. Woah. Not that I’m complaining but, Woah._

“O’Course.” Butch murmured removing his boots to lay down on her bed. 

They laid across from each other for a while, Butch still not really knowing where her boundaries were kept his hands to himself. Till she pressed into him, he wrapped his arms around her and held her tight. 

“Panic… Panic attack.” He had one of them before. Maybe not just one, but he knew how they felt. This must’ve been mild cause when he had them he felt like his body was gonna drop dead to the ground and his mind was hanging onto the edges as much as they could. 

Then he remembered the table of contents James told him about for his anxiety.

“It’s gonna be okay.” Reassurance.

Butch held her tighter, blushing furiously when he realized she wasn’t wearing a bra under her nightgown. Not that he expected them to wear those uncomfortable things to bed. The time they get to wear whatever they want without being judged.

“I’m right here.” Butch didn’t mean to get so intimate but he kissed the top of her head, rubbing her back to try and get her to stop shaking like crazy.

_“You’re safe.”_ The little cry she let out made him place another to her head, and another to her nose, another to her eyebrow, forehead. Letting her just- let it out since he couldn’t force her to get over it. Just had to be there which--- It wasn’t his place to be but he was pissed off her Father wasn’t there. When he should be most. 

Though just as he was about to get angry he remembered this wasn’t about him. 

“Butch?” He could feel her playing with the fabric of his t-shirt, but he wasn’t reading into it like he usually did when a gal did that.

“Mhm?” She was about to continue what she wanted to say, but it was almost like he heard her request since he took that hand against his chest on his own. Running his thumb along it. 

“I’m gonna try and sleep.” Ariel’s lips pressed a chaste one to the back of his hand as a ‘thank you’ and he almost screamed, jumped out of the bed, and do the whole _Singin’ in the Rain_ bit he watched with Ariel, from how adorable she looked. 

_If only… If only…_

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Ariel was looking straight at her clock she had mounted above her doorway. 

_5:29 am_

She stared at the clock waiting for it to hit 5:30, and as she waited she could hear footsteps headed towards her room. Knocks on the door were steady and heavy-handed so she knew who it was as usual. No words needed, Ariel heard the padding of their tired feet go towards the bathroom, and before she knew it the shower was on. 

This was what it was like after everything. After the machine was up and running and the definitive fight between the Enclave and the Brotherhood for the purifier was over. But there were still remnants of them. Trying to cling to the remnants of their beliefs in hopes of a comeback. 

Though after she lost him, her one reason for coming out into the world, moving on, living, and breathing. Was gone. 

_First step…_

Ariel slowly sat up on her elbows and leaned up against her bed frame, taking a few deep breaths before she fully sat up and had her back against the headboard. 

_Second step_

Ariel’s fingers tried to card through her hair and the matted mess at her nape was beginning to grow the longer she put off brushing it or cutting it in Rivet City. With a heavy sigh, she finally stood up and felt the weight of her heart almost pull her back into bed as she forced herself to gravitate towards her desk chair to get ready. 

As she finally got rid of as many knots as she was able she noticed her retainer container off to the side and suddenly heard his voice.

**_“Don’t forget to wear your retainers, sweetheart.”_ **

Ariel couldn’t help but softly cry at that, even his nagging she missed. 

_I can’t stay here forever._

_But I want to…_

“Ariel! You gonna get up or should I come to splash you with water?” The door opened. 

“M’fine Clover…” Clover wasn’t very good at consoling people or being nice- at least not in a friendly way. She was still learning. 

“Oh, you’re crying.” Clover played with her sideburn awkwardly. Moving in the awkwardly pat the top of Ariel’s head. “There-there…” That made her crack a smile at that, it showed her compassion was getting better. 

“Thanks, Clover.” Said woman smiled at that, glad she was of help. 

“Well since you’re up. I wanted to tell you I’m gonna be heading back to the Lincoln Memorial, I probably won’t be back for a few weeks. You think you’ll be alright?” Ariel finished tying her buns and rose from her chair. 

“I’ll be okay, I have Charon,” Clover snorted leaning her hip on her desk. Ariel knew being dismissed or without being guided was a new thing for her but- after her Father’s death, Clover had to start taking her own initiative in life. Ariel was proud of her.

“Alright kid, I’ll see you when I see you.” 

Ariel watched her leave and now heard Charon using the bathroom. 

She didn’t want to leave her room, but the door was open and the invitation to go out today after a week of being indoors was tempting. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


They ended up leaving Megaton in the evening due to Ariel putting off their travels. “Where are we going tonight Mi--Ariel.” He almost got it. Charon and Ariel were heading towards ‘The Republic of Dave’, now known as the ‘Democracy of Rosie’. _How creative…_

“Democracy of Rosie, I wanna see how things are going over there and if I can show the kids a thing or two. A lot of them are old enough to have guns now and-- There isn’t exactly anyone there qualified to.” She says while slamming her hand on her Pipboy as white noise started to play as they passed through Spring Vale. 

**_“This is an automated distress message from.. Vault-Tec,”_ ** Ariel was glued to her spot and stopped immediately. Charon looked at her with inquiry on his face, scoping the area since they were sitting ducks out in the open. **_“Vault 1-0-1. Message begins.”_ **

**_“I know you’re still out there, somewhere. After you left things went downhill. Please if you forgive me--- Or at least care about the people in here. Stop looking for your Father and help me stop mine. The password is my name.”_ ** _They want me back? I can go back?--_

“So what’re we gonna do?” Charon asks, seeing the distress in his masters- his friends face. 

“I- We have to help them… We can’t-” Ariel thought of everything that happened leading up to her leaving and thought it over. Wondering if it was really worth it to go back. To see her old home. But she wanted to know what happened to it. Wanted to know if Bessie was alive- or if Joe and Vanessa were okay. And Butch-- _No- No Butch._

“I won’t let them all die, not everyone in the Vault was an asshole. They don’t deserve the same fate because of his actions.” She explains doing a 180 to head toward the Vault entrance. Charon behind her with his shotgun in hand. 

“Point taken.” He gruffs as they travel toward the hill. 

Just as they neared the Vault door inside she stopped midway inside the cave, a little shell shocked as she processed everything. Everything had happened so fast that night. Nothing able to be processed. She processed her friends’ deaths a few days after in Megaton, processed being kicked out of her home after a few months, and processed Amata’s reasoning for her actions a year later. 

And it was all coming down to this. 

With shaky fingers, she entered the code. 

A-M-A-T-A

_Here goes nothing…_

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


“Officer Taylor this is the last straw, you can’t keep us in here forever!”

“Go back to the Lower levels young man, before I have to make a decision neither of us wants to make.” 

Officer Gomez came in from behind him and Butch motioned at him. “Gomez, you wanna get outta here Dontcha? Let us through, some of us don’t--” Butch stopped in his tracks and all thought was empty once he’d spotted her behind Officer Gomez. Like the air in his body was taken out of him and replaced with the freshest he’d ever had, everything in his head was spiraling out of his brain and towards his mouth, getting jumbled at the lump in his throat as he tried to figure out what to say to her- it’d been so long- too long- The Overseer _lied_ about everything- even her death. 

“Ariel? My god- Is it really you?” He was about to run over there, forgetting he still had Toothpick out ready to fight but then he’d been cut off, seeing Ariel’s lips move as though she’d murmured something and an almost seven-foot beast was in front of him, shotgun at the ready aimed at him. 

_The hell? Fella sat too long under the sun?_

“Back. Off.” The zombie looking guy had cocked his gun to show he meant business, and Butch’s eyes were switching between the gun and Ariel who was avoiding eye contact with him. 

“Ariel what ha--” Charon stood his ground and waited for him to leave before he had to waste good bullets on the ground for a warning shot. 

“Just leave me alone Butch.” Ariel finally said his name, finally heard her voice after so long and it wasn’t as satisfying as he thought it would be. Thought they’d run into each other's arms or something. _Something._

He let her walk off with that zombie and watched them head through towards the Lower level, knowing he would beat her there since he had the shortcut on his side. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


As they were heading down the Lower level Charon grumbled. “Who was that?” 

“ _Nobody_ ,” She murmured, a key point in telling if she was lying to herself. 

“Nobody?” Charon repeated it and watched her face scrunch up. 

“Yeah, nobody.” They were only a few steps out of Bessie’s diner when they spotted her. The relief that came with seeing her alive was something else and it made her even happier when Bessie happily hugged her. Strangely she felt like a kid again, just for that moment. 

“Can’t believe you’re alive Baby! Look at cha. My God-- How’d you get in here?” 

Bessie pulled away from the hug running her hand over the top of Ariel’s head a few times in affection and had a bright smile. Though Ariel could see the stress of the events getting to her, could see the fine-lines of stress on her face almost settling in. 

Ariel sniffled, hands shaking from relief and excitement. “I-I got a distress signal from, from Amata… Said you guys needed my help despite everything,” Bessie had some tears as well, wiped them away with the back of her hands. 

“People are still a little sensitive about what happened, don’t let what they say get to you. It was only a matter of time for things to fall apart. Everything these past couple of years were always patched with lies and more deceit. About damn time people fight back.” Bessie motions for Ariel to follow her out of the Diner. 

“You should talk to Amata, she’s in your Father's old Office.” 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


“Amata, she’s back- She really is _alive.”_ Butch had run straight to the office to tell Amata, Christine was in the room as well. Just as well shocked and almost happy to see the other girl again. 

“Really?” Christine got up from her seat and went to find Amata who was sitting in the back with Andy. 

“Amata, you won’t believe it.” Amata sighed as she exited the room, standing in the doorway about to tell Christine about her headache when she spotted Ariel in the entrance. 

“Ariel.” Amata’s face broke into an awkward smile, taking small steps towards her. In disbelief, she really came back- after everything she said to her. It all came flooding back to her, what she’d said, how rude she was in their last moments together-- 

“I can’t believe you came back-- I, everything has been crazy ever since you and your Father left. 

“I know, I Uhm,” Ariel glanced at Butch for a moment but quickly looked away when he caught her looking. “I got your distress signal about your Father… I would’ve thought they would let you guys leave but… I saw Jim and Steve’s bodies in body bags by the Vault door..” Ariel almost couldn’t stomach the stench. 

“My God, I-I thought maybe they escaped.” Amata thought they escaped since the last they heard from them was them speaking about their escape plan to leave together, and be free. 

“You should get settled in, At this time in the Vault, we’d be sleeping… So, talking to my Father isn’t an option right now.” Amata explains awkwardly folding her arms over her chest. 

Ariel didn’t let it show on her face how good it felt to have time to plan it out _and_ get to go back possibly. Back to her old home. At least what’s left of it anyway. 

“I can, I can go to my old quarters?” 

“Uh—“ Amata’s eyes briefly went to Butch’s before going to Charon and back to Ariel’s. 

“You can… Just, Uhm-“ 

“Did you give my quarters away?—“ Amata didn’t verbally answer her, just a head shake and with that Ariel left that strange situation and went straight to her room without interruption. 

The closer she got the more memories came flooding. “Charon?” 

He hummed. “Can you do me a favor? There’s something I wanted to grab in the Reactor level before I left but- I couldn’t cause well- yeah. So could you get it for me?” Charon lifted a brow which meant, _‘What is it?’_ in Charon language. She was quite fluent at it now. 

“It uhm… Looks like a uhm blanket- I mean it _is_ a blanket, just- can you get it for me? You just have to follow the signs; it's super easy.” Ariel watched him go and once she was sure he was long gone she was standing in front of her doorway, staring at it like it was a stranger. 

_I almost forgot what it felt like to be here…_

_What if I can stay? Finally be back home-- No, No, I can’t, not after everything._

_Unless…_

Opening it she expected it to look the way it had when she left, couch flipped over from Officer Kendall, James’ bedroom door open with things thrown around, cabinets haphazardly opened to get any food and drink for the road, and her room.

It was-- Made. 

Bed made, chair pushed in at her desk, pillow back in it’s made position. Almost like someone was staying here after she’d left. They even made her Father’s room back up and it-- 

Touched her a little bit, though the who was unbeknownst to her since it felt like no-one was true to her at the end of the day.

Though she wasted no time and jumped in the shower, knowing almost everyone would be going to be already. So of course she took advantage of the hot water and sat in it. 

Charon knocked on the door before telling her he retrieved it, and she asked him to leave it in her old room. Not before she told him it was okay to _rest_ in her Father’s room before they had to get down to business in the morning. 

Ariel spent almost an hour in the shower taking everything in, remembering every shower she’d ever had like a weirdo. Even her designated shampoo and conditioner were still in its canisters on the wall, but she realized there was extra(?). Her Father never used this soap, nor had his own shampoo and conditioner since he went for the buzz cut all the time. 

_Who the hell was in here?_

_Whatever… Probably just don’t remember properly._

  
  


**

  
  


**“Hey, girlie.”**

Ariel felt small once she heard his voice like she was back in her home-- having her space invaded again. James was working late _again_ the night it happened, and the other nights it did. 

The relief that came with killing him was gone as she slowly turned around wrapping herself tighter in the old robe. Turning around she spotted him, a scar where his eye used to be, right where she shot him. 

“ **Stevie** ,” Ariel said it like she was a venomous snake, and watched as the man adjusted his belt-- the action made a shiver go up her spine in fear. 

“Didn’t think you’d survive out there… Always was so small and weak--” 

“Weak enough to shoot you in the face?” That confident Ariel peered through, the confidence built outside of the Vault, the Ariel that prospered outside, that grew. 

Stevie didn’t like that answer one bit, she could see it in the way he scrunched his hands into fists and took a few heavy practiced steps towards her. The small coffee table in front of the couch being the only thing between her and Stevie- without her weapons- without anyone made her jumpy. 

_No, you’re not alone- you have-!_

“You think you’re tough cause you were outside a little? Why’re you back anyway? Daddy didn’t want his **whore** daughter by his side?” Ariel hadn’t even realized he was closing the distance, his words bled into her line of thoughts, all over her memories like ink spilled over paper. 

_Was that why? Did he not want me to come cause I--?_

“That isn’t- I’m _not_ a whore-” Once she snapped out of that haze and wiped her damp hair out of her face, he was no longer across the coffee table, taking short strides toward her that made her feel like the ground was shaking under her bare feet. 

“Then why’re you so _inviting_?...” Stevie had gone to pull at the tie on her robe, but practice out in the wastes had given her better reflex speed, and she easily slapped his hand away before he could. 

“I- Stevie-” Ariel’s hands had come up to keep distance between them, but he was beyond pissed and there was no more ‘Mr. Niceguy’. Everything was happening so fast and she could feel her body start to shut down all over again, that mechanism it grew accustomed to whenever he-- 

“Listen bitch. You’re gonna pay me back for what you did to my damn face, and you’re gonna do it good. Underst--Oof!” 

“Get offa her you fucking animal!” She could hear a weapon cocking faintly over the tinnitus that started ringing in her ears, and voices yelling over one another. 

Once it had gotten quiet she removed her hands that were clasped over her ears. 

Waiting for him to say what he usually did- _Was it really over that quickly?_

“Ariel! Regain your awareness of your surroundings please.” She knew that voice anywhere. She thought he left her, thought she was alone at that moment. But-

“Is it over? Did he finish?” Ariel stood up gently rubbing at her chin that had just been grabbed, Charon was looking at her incredulously since she’d’ve never let anyone that up-close without fighting back, so he knew something was off with her. Knew she’d elaborate when she wanted to. Realized she was having an anxiety attack or at least at the brink of one and noticed his tone wasn’t the best, so he looked over at that boy she didn’t want to talk to earlier- handing that mans ass to him like there was no tomorrow and dragged him to God knows where once the guy was unconscious. 

“Stay here. I will return to you. Do your breathing exercises.” 

Charon headed over to the voices and found the man arguing with an ugly one with box-shaped hair. 

“I told you your fuckin’ brother is a no-good-bastard! Get him outta my sight before I put new holes in him, Wally.” 

“Butch who the fuck--!” _So his name was Butch? Rhymes with bitch. Heh._

Charon was watching the whole ordeal, waiting for them to finish or for him to step in and end it for them.

“I don’t care, what the fuck you wanna say, this ain’t a Goddamn debate! Get him outta here Wally! I _don’t_ wanna fight you.” Said man was going to try and fight him till he spotted the Ghoul that was traveling with Ariel. Knew it was best not to fuck with anyone that had them at their back. 

Charon grumbled, “ **Get out** of here boy.” 

Wally nervously chuckled patting Butch on the shoulder, who swiped on his jacket as though Wally’s very hand stained the leather. “I- I- was just leaving pal, thanks!” With that, the boy dragged off the wanna-be cop to wherever Butch and Charon stood in silence for a moment till Butch broke it. “She uhm… God, she okay? He didn’t touch her anywhere else right?” 

“If you want to know, then ask her.” 

“But--”

“Am I Ariel?” 

“No, but she--” 

“So then go talk to her.” 

Charon and Butch began walking back to the quarters when he’d tried again. 

“But--!” 

“ **No.”** Charon growled it at him and Butch grumbled under his breath.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


“I-I’m okay Charon you can leave me be…” That was enough for him to go back to sleep, the rarity to sleep without having dire danger on his mind apart from being in Megaton was an opportunity he’d never let go of.  
  
“Okay. I will be in the room. I acted accordingly and let the boy handle the man. Let me know if I need to kill anyone.” Ariel nodded her head at his words, glad he didn’t kill anyone since that would’ve further progressed the hate train on her even so much as breathing the air in the Vault. 

“You alright? I Uhm-- I was coming over to, see you and---”

Ariel cut him off heading for her bedroom. “Thanks for the help. You can go now though.”

 _Short and sweet just like usual when she pushed away people- me. I’m getting nowhere with her._ Butch thought with a sigh as he tried to think of something to cheer her up. 

“Wait! Ariel, hold up—“ She shut the door to the room behind her and he was left hanging _again._ Butch wanted to talk about what exactly just happened and she was acting like it was nothing. 

Butch leaned his ear against the door trying to figure out if she was just laying down to go to bed or not when the door opened, his weight dragging him towards the floor, thankful for his height he had enough time to catch himself before he could really fall and look like an ass in front of her. She was dressed now in a long sleeve and sweats- though they didn’t look like pajamas, they looked like the kind of sweats a soldier in their textbooks wore. 

_She’s dressed for bed ready for a fight. Though it makes sense why she would do it now…_

“You alright?” Ariel indulged him a little and nodded her head, arms wrapping around herself to give some kind of sense of her own security. 

“That's Uhm. That’s good I’m glad.” The last time they fell into awkward silences was when they first started being friends again, despite how careful and hesitant she was she let him in with open arms, and now it felt like he had doors and walls put up in front of him again. But if he had to take them down brick by brick he’d do it. If that meant she’d talk to him again- like before- she had no idea how much he missed her but he was still working on voicing his emotions, and despite how much he hyped himself up it scared him. Especially admitting he _yearned_ for someone with his heart and not his dick leading the pack wasn’t easy.

Ariel finally looked him in the eyes and in some way--- It felt he was talking to a new person, but he knew her, knew her his whole life, and here she was looking different, built different, skin a few shades darker. _Probably from the sun outside._ More faint freckles and beauty marks than the last he’d seen her face, skin now marked by scars a small one was by her eye, looked like it was a quick swipe at her face. Butch realized he was just staring at this point shamelessly and cleared his throat suddenly feeling that heat that had been burning his chest for so long after she’d left came back. 

“From the way you looked, I’d say--” _Fuck I don’t wanna be insensitive._

“I- Shit.” Swiping a frustrated hand through his hair he swayed his weight between his legs and Ariel looked both annoyed and- concerned. 

“I just wanted to say, I m- It’s- It’s really nice to see you.” Butch finally met her eyes again after looking at the ceiling for so long to gather his words before he got caught up staring at her face again. 

Ariel scoffed at him and Butch’s face fell, _What the hell did I fucking do?_ “Says the boy that was pretending to be my friend? Yeah sure, Butch. If we’re gonna start off on a bed of lies then hey, it’s nice seeing you too buddy!” Butch clenched his jaw, shaking his head as he put a finger in the air as if asking for a time-out. 

“Hold on, hold the fuckin’ intercom. What’re you talkin’ about?” Butch says entering the room a little as if he’d heard her wrong. 

“You think I’m just a fool?! There’s nowhere to hide, I know you were just using me to find out any dirt on my Daddy. To find out about the little project he was working on that no-one knew about. Or was I just a conquest? Another ‘girlie’ for you to get your dick wet and laugh about later?” Butch could see the pain in her eyes and he kept opening and closing his mouth as he tried to figure out how to explain himself. _Who the fuck am I giving an ass beating?_

“ _Ari.” Patience. Patience. Don’t flip, this ain’t what you’re here for._ Was his mantra.

“No. Don’t fucking _Ari_ me, you don’t deserve to call me that!” She sneered at him, turning away from him to wipe the frustrated tear that threatened to fall before he could see it. 

“I never-- No okay well, I **did** do that. I **was** getting dirt for The Overseer, but then I got caught up in shit and I forgot the point of why I was talking to you in the first place--” 

“Oh so, Ha! So, it **_is_ ** true. You only talked to me for that one purpose in the first place huh?” 

“No! No, I did it- I talked to you cause I-” 

“Oh cause you wanted to fuck, then you realized, _Jee I can’t bang the prude might as well get some info for that bastard in the office_ ,” She exaggerated his accent imitation, “huh? Did I hit it on the nose Butch? Is that all I was?” 

“No, no- I did wanna be your friend I swear, I fucking _swear_ I wanted to be your friend for so long and- and it just so happened I had already had that little deal with The Overseer okay! I fucking _swear_ those never played a part in our friendship. I fuckin’ pinky promise and cross my heart and everything **_please_ ** believe me. I never said a peep about anything you told me, I kept everything you said, to me, a secret, **_everything._ **” Butch flinched when she whipped around, eyes a sad, confused, angry mess. He didn’t know what he looked like, but he knew he was no Franki Valli at the moment. 

“I’m sorry if I- God- I didn’t even get to tell you the truth- you were out there all this time thinkin’ our friendship was a goddamn scam and it wasn’t, I fucking swear I’d **never** hurt you like that- that ain’t a prank, that’s a fuckin’ felony doing something like that to someone.” Butch put a hand over his heart as he talked and Ariel had her eyes shut tight like she was avoiding looking at him again. 

“Whatever.” Was all she had to say to him and that’s when it was his turn to laugh, “Just whatever? That’s all you’re gonna say to that? This is the first time I’ve seen you in forever and you say whatever to everything I just said? Ariel, come on-” Butch reached out for her and she moved out of the way of his touch, shaking her head. “I don’t want to be touched.” 

“Sorry, sorry, I know- can… Do you think we can start over?” Butch’s voice was much softer now and out of the corner of her eye she spotted Charon coming out of his room ready to kill someone, and she waved her hand at him, ‘I’m okay’, and he went back into his room shutting the door this time. 

“Maybe.” That was enough for him, that was a baby step to regaining her trust. Butch could still sense some doubt in her and he was alright with that. Especially after everything she went through before she left- he would be doubtful anyone down here cared for him just like her. 

“Okay. That’s great! Uh- yeah- So, I’ll let you get some rest… Do you want me to stay nearby? After y’know what happened with that nasty bastard Stevie.” Butch didn’t like the way she looked deflated and almost fearful at the mention of his name- maybe he should’ve put more holes in his after all…. “M’sorry I wasn’t here sooner- listen if he ever tries and pulls something like that again I’ll--” 

“It’s fine Butch… I have Charon.” 

“Right- well, I’ll get going then,” Butch stuffed his hands in his new jacket, then pulled one out rubbing at the back of his neck and putting it in his pant pocket. “Let you get some rest,”

“Goodnight Butch.” Ariel cracked a smile at him and gave him a small wave. 

“G’night.”

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


After Butch had left she took a seat at her desk, noticing everything mostly in the same place, her microfusion lamp was off but thankfully it still worked when she flicked it on. _I ought to take this home with me…_

Leaning back in her chair she noticed something, a paper sticking out of her drawer. She remembered it all over again, the little notes that were left in her textbook at the end of every week. Expecting it to be an old note she opened the desk, ready to stuff a couple of papers back in when more had flooded out of the top. _What the--_ Taking the one at the top out she opened it. _There’s no way they still left me letters-_ She pulled out another, one after the other. They were all about pining for her, yearning for her to come back, if she’d known who this was long ago coming back would’ve felt so much better. Someone to look forward to. Ariel did miss Butch and Amata but they didn’t need to know that _… Can’t believe they still left me notes._ She smiled to herself while reading one, 

**_“_ ** _It’s been kind of gloomy without you._

_That’s what happens_

_when the sunshine goes away._ **_”_ **

  
  


_Oh my god…_

**_“_ ** _I miss you, for too long_

_in too many ways,_

_that it became just another part of me:_

_engraved deeper into my heart with the passing of time._

_I would wake up_

_stretch,_

_breathe,_

_and miss you,_

_they told me to let it go,_

_to let_ **_you,_ **

_and I would say:_

_You cannot simply will your heart to stop beating,_

_that no matter how long you hold your breath,_

_I could only stop missing you,_

_if I stopped being myself entirely_ _.”_

_I- Why couldn’t they have just come clean sooner-_

_“_ _I should’ve told you_

_How I felt about you_

_What I thought of you_

_How I yearned for you_

_But I’m a coward_

_That’s just what we do_

_And now you’re gone forever_

_And I’ll never know if we could’ve been_

_I’m sorry for never being your knight in shining armor_

_I was confused_

_Caught up in what others thought_

_Caught up in being an idiot_

_Please forgive me, wherever you are._

_I miss you, and I always will think of what could’ve been_

_If I hadn’t been a coward._ _”_

  
  


Ariel re-read it over and over again. Thinking of every damned person in the Vault. For her admirer. For the ‘Coward’. In some way, she yearned for them as well, this faceless person. That she never truly met before-- Her mind had lingered on Butch many times, but the **doubt** of it and the fear that came with it boiled in the pit of her stomach. She knew it wasn’t him. Knew he’d never be that lovely with his words, at least not for her no matter how she hoped he would. They’d almost kissed many times cause she wanted to- wanted it to be him. But always found herself leaning away, knowing this someone was out there. Knowing someone that loved her and her mind as well made her want to put her heart out on a plate and wait for this someone to claim it. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> phewie, idk what to say in my notes ever, but i hope YOU who is reading this had a good time and i hope u like how i wrote ariels welcome home chapter. a lot of shit is gonna go down the next chapter and ariel is gonna leave with a 'bang'.


	9. leaving- for the last time?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> with the new freedom charon's had over the while he doesn't take shit from anyone. old things come to light before Ariel leaves and she wonders if she really needed to open that can of worms or not. nonetheless, they out for what feels like the millionth to Ariel, to her friends and acquaintance is their first.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey, its been a hot minute! heres jus a lil smthn before they really head out of the vault finally andddd then sum real juice of the washington area is gonna happen in the next one possibly...

“You’re not gonna last another generation, you need to open the Vault. Unless you want to be inbred and cause genetic mutations and likely will start to make an increase in undesirable genes, illnesses, and more Alphonse. And, I’m sure you don’t want to have a bunch of inbreds all over the place-- At least of your morally just enough, unless you are okay with lying to the next generation--”

“You,” Alphonse sighed looking back out towards the Atrium. “You’re right, our numbers have dwindled over the years- I suppose you are right, as much as I don’t want to admit it. I guess what I thought was best for us all was- there was some fault in it,” Ariel gave him a sympathetic smile, glad she was able to keep things civil. 

“I know I… Wasn’t the kindest of people- And cursed your family name but I must thank you, and your Father as well- it wasn’t a mistake after all letting you inside. Now, I- I need to speak to Amata immediately, thank you again Ms. Ibriham.” Alphonse ran off after that, after excusing himself and passing Charon who was waiting near Jonas’ old desk. He noticed she wasn’t coming out yet and entered the barren office, “Ariel?” She turned around at the mention of her voice and sighed exhaustedly, “Most convincing was the incest part,” Charon grunted a laugh at that and watched her head out of the room. “What are we going to do now?” 

“I, I guess it’s time to leave?” She guessed walking back down to the lower levels to catch up with Alphonse in the lower level. “Just wanna make sure things are set right before we go..” Ariel knew she would never be welcome to stay. People still blamed her, even Pepper blamed her and her Father still. She was tempted to smack her when she’d made insensitive comments every time they’d crossed paths but decided against it out of respect. “Did you  _ want  _ to stay?” Charon asks continuing to scope the area for that man from last night; Charon made it clear to Ariel he would kill him if he so much as looked at them wrong. No tolerance was left in Charon after that for these Vault dwellers. 

“I don’t know. A part of me does- the part that grew up here- the part before everything went to shit-” Ariel shrugged, feeling that pit in his chest open just a little at the thought of her Father. “But there’s no reason,” Her mind trailed off to Butch, to that someone, to Amata, to Bessie, to Joseph, to Vanessa. “No reason to stay. No place for me here either.” Then she remembered the deal she made with Joseph and Vanessa, “Just remembered- I agreed to escort Jo and Van to Rivet City, so we’ll be making a pit-stop in the Citadel after we drop them off.” 

“That is why I am appointing you officially as the new Overseer. I realize now, that I must let someone else take over the responsibility, and- you have shown you have what it takes to lead the Vault.” Was all she needed to hear come out of that old man’s mouth before she decided it was time to go get Jo and Van so they could leave. “Let’s head out now, get a head start to being kicked out.” 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


“We’re ready to go! Glad to finally leave this dump-” Vanessa hit Joseph’s shoulder and he winced, “Yeesh alright, alright, Take it, slow honey,” Upon seeing Vanessa leave their quarters, Ariel’s jaw practically dropped to the floor when she saw the huge bump on Vanessa’s stomach. “You- Oh my gosh- You’re carrying a child?!” Van smiled, “You bet! And they’re gonna grow up to be big and strong just like their Daddy,” She says and Jo smiled as well, “We’re just gonna wait till they’re born for we start using pronouns- don’t wanna jinx what I want,” Jo says and Van snorts. Though Ariel was more than happy to know they had a baby on the way, that complicated things, way more than they thought it would. “I’ve got a week left. We should get to Rivet City by then right?” Ariel nodded her head, “Yeah, yeah we should.”  _ Hopefully, those boats are still functioning- or not stolen.  _

  
  


“Ariel?” Amata ran over once she’d spotted them and found Jo and Van behind her with bags. “You guys are leaving?” Joseph nodded his head like she was asking a question she already had the answer to. “Yeah, this place? Ain’t for us no more. Maybe when you get things situated we’ll visit you sometime Amata, but for now, we’re leaving with Ariela.” Amata nodded her head giving them awkward smiles.  _ Oh, she wants to talk to  _ **_me_ ** _.  _

“You guys can wait by the Vault door with Charon I won’t be long,” The trio nodded their heads and headed out, passing Officer Taylor who led them over. 

“So,” Amata starts. 

“So,” Ariel says, crossing her arms over her chest awkwardly. 

“You did it. I- Thank you, Ariela. You have no idea how much it means to me that you took time out to come back- even after,” Amata’s' voice got smaller as she said it, “Even after everything that happened, even after everything I said to you…” Ariel shrugged, “I’m over it now Amata, I know you were just angry and hurt- Maybe not at the time, but I understand where you came from now. A year later…” Ariel wanted to run out already and the feeling grew even more when she spotted Butch coming in through the Lower level short-cut.  _ We may have cleared things up… But I’m still wary. _

“Listen, Amata, I forgive you, all you have to do now is forgive yourself.” 

“I know you just came and helped us but-” 

_ I’m one step ahead of you…  _

“I was kind of on my way out actually, so it’s fine, no hard feelings,” 

“Oh- Right! Right… It’ll be awhile before we open up to the world, but when we do I- I hope you visit.” 

“I’ll see you later Amata.” Ariel didn’t expect it but she pulled her into a brief hug before abruptly pulling away and heading back to the lower level the same way Butch had come through. After the whole moment was over Butch made his way over to Ariel, “Hey,” 

“Hi… Here to say bye?” Butch shook his head. “Nah, I actually was heading out as well. This ain’t really a place I wanna stay and- I had plans to leave anyway.” He shrugged, rubbing at the back of his neck. “Where’re you headed?”  _ Got a feeling he’s gonna be tagging along…  _

“Rivet City,” 

She watched his face light up at the mention, “Oh! I er uh- I’m actually headed that way myself,” Butch said gesturing to his packed back-pack and the 10mm Gomez gave him for the road. “You wanna come with us?” Ariel offered kind of hoping he’d take it, last thing she wanted was losing someone all over again--- so when he did she hid her smile by pivoting towards the Vault exit. 

“Alright come on everyone is probably at the Vault door--”

“Hey!”  _ Jesus. I thought he’d learned not to try again- _

“You can’t just  **go** .” Stevie says, completely ignoring Butch’s presence. “Not after what you did to me before you left-- Don't Cha remember?” Ariel grimaced and pulled Butch’s arm to just follow her out. “Stevie. I’m not the little girl I used to be. And I’m definitely not as forgiving. Get out of my way.” Stevie had enough of this, and enough of Butch’s attitude. Pushing Butch out of his way he reached out for Ariel with his baton in the other and readied it above his head. 

“You’re not going  **anywhere** !” Before Ariel could stop him, Charon shot Stevie in the kneecap with his shotgun-- tempted to shoot the other as he fell to the floor clutching the injury. “C-Charon! I didn’t- I-” 

“You froze up.” Charon growled at Stevie when he tried to stand back up as though he had a chance while injured. “Last thing we need is you going brain dead.” 

“Murderer! Look at what she did to poor Stevie!” Pepper ran over and went to smack the girl, but she stopped her. “You’re on Stevie’s side?! Stevie is a bastard- He’s a fucking pedophile who took advantage of a little girl that was always home alone, when her Father was working, was  **helping** you ingrates!- Stevie who sexually harassed Chip Taylor because he was curious! Is that who you support? You fucking airheaded  **_bitch!_ ** Fuck  **_you_ ** . Fuck this Vault. Chip deserved better and now I realize-  _ I  _ deserved better.” Ariel’s eyes burned with painful held back tears mixed with rage. If only she’d spoken up at the time- Maybe? Chip was still dead and it hurt her a little remembering how he’d talk about the outside and how much he wanted to do agriculture.

“Let’s get outta here Ari, come on,” Butch of course was in shock the guys kneecap was blown off, and was about to go at it with Charon till he heard what she’d said- the small ounce of respect he had for Stevie slid off him like a non-stick pan to oil. He coaxed her away from the crowd that was beginning to form and didn’t wanna wait for The new or old Overseer to show up and stop them from leaving. “Might wanna get Andy for help with this Pepper.” 

**_“Who took advantage of a little girl that was always home alone--”_ ** __

_ When I wasn’t there was he?-- _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> me and my homies hate stevie and pepper lol, i feel like this chapter was a bit shitty but i think the next one will make up for it :) OMG also HAH i finished watching that show with jfk and lincoln n stuff as high schoolers?? clone high i think and lol jfk is giving me such butch vibes


	10. new memories and the old

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> idk how to summarize this chapter but theres a lot and i dont remember most of it because id written this back in november and hadnt touched it since! so anyhow i did some gentle corrections and additions, and i hope u guys like :)

“Jesus! That shit is bright,” Butch groaned putting his hands over his eyes, looking to Van and Jo who had the issued sunglasses in the Vault for those leaving for the first time. “Where’d you get those?!” Joseph clapped his hand over Butch’s shoulder with a laugh, “They were in The Overseers office, Amata gave us a pair for us for the sun,” After a few moments and some walking though they removed their sunglasses and adjusted to the light pretty well. 

“We’re gonna stop in Megaton real quick, I need to pick up and drop off some things before we can head out,” Ariel announces, pointing at the metal city nearby. “Wow…” Came Vanessa, hand gently caressing her bump as they went up a slope to enter the city. “Oh--” Ariel immediately spotted the usual man out front and had a few bottles from the Vault ready for him. “Hey Vincent, here’s some water and caps for food in the Brass Lantern,” The man’s smile grew wide as she handed them off to him, “Oh thank you, thank you, really God bless you, sweetheart, I’m still working on making some money for gear-” 

“I know, I know, you’re doing good so far scavenging metal Vinny, I gotta go now but I’ll see you later okay?” Vincent nodded his head while sipping on some of the cold water like it was a dream and Ariel waved before leading the pack into Megaton. “I just have to grab some things, Charon. Can you take them home please? I gotta talk to Gob about our possible ride to Rivet City,” Charon nodded his head and lead them there, but Butch’s eyes lingered on Ariel as she walked the opposite direction and out of instinct he did what he did best and slithered away from the group and towards Ariel. Watched her go into a bar and sit at the front. He was about to make himself known when he watched her strike up a conversation with Gob. He lingered behind her and let them talk before she abruptly turned around, blade aimed straight at him like she’d jab him in the throat with it- but once she realized it was only him behind her she recoiled, murmured a small apology under her breath and Butch felt a little ashamed at how hot he thought that was. “Sorry-- I, I saw Gob looking behind me and so I just, yeah- sorry if I scared you,” Ariel turned her body to lean her back against the wall the bar leaned on. No one to her back, just as she liked. 

“Hey, hey, it’s fine, really, I probably would’ve done the same after bein’ out here for so long,” Butch reassures, hand rubbing the back of his neck to stifle the small fear and  _ maybe  _ even excited bumps that had risen there. 

“So. About my ride?” Ariel continues and Gob looks around for the nasty coot before back at the young lady in front of him, “They may or may not be at the docks as usual, lately there’s been way too many raiders over there,”  _ Ah, just idiots with guns, not so bad… not so bad.  _ Ariel hummed. “That’s all they’ve reported in the area?” She inquires sipping on her nuka-cola. 

“So far, that’s all they’ve radioed in. Nova said they shouldn’t be all that troublesome though, they’re not organized, just junkies she thinks.” Ariel liked the sound of that and proceeded to stand from her seat just as Moriarity was leaving his room in the back. 

“Thanks Gob, I’ll be back soon,” She winked and tossed him a little something of caps for the tip, “Is Nova working right now? I kinda wanna say hi before I go,” Gob made a signal to not bring her up, and so she bit her tongue and nodded her head, “Alright, I’ll see you later then.”

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


“So, we’re takin’ a boat to Rivet City?” Ariel puffed some air out, it was anxiety-filled since the weight on her shoulders of bringing a pregnant woman, an immature man, and-- well she didn’t worry too much about Joseph he could hold his own, she knew that when he killed a Raider by Springvale middle school with an old 10mm. So at least he could aim straight, Butch? Well, no comment, for now… 

“Preferably… I’d like to drop you all off at the docks for the boat to Rivet City, but it sounds like the trip there might be a  _ little  _ difficult,” Ariel says as they head up to her house that she- after getting permission made just a few renovations to. It was a pretty alright-looking house, to say the least on the outside, but the inside was where she really needed the permissions- bringing in certain things was a bit of a damn chore. 

“Woah- this is your spot?” He says taking a look around, seeing Van and Jo on the couch with some water Charon most likely gave them. “Uh, yeah, you can wait over there with Van and Jo, I shouldn’t be that long,” She says heading upstairs, once he’d taken a seat on the couch Van got up, “Just wanna use the ladies room,” Jo instinctively got up to help her and she laughed, “You don’t have to accompany me everywhere I go, Jo!” Van teased kissing him on the cheek, “I’ll holler if anything,” Jo sat back down obediently and looked like he was about to have a heart attack seeing her go up steps without him, Butch thought it was cute, the way he worried over her, they probably were the healthiest couple he’d ever seen in the Vault if he was a smart boy he probably would’ve modeled himself after James and Joseph. Joseph noticed Butch staring and laughed at himself to break the silence, “Yeah I know, I’m probably a little overbearing but I can’t help it y’know?” Butch nodded his head as if he knew, he kind of did in a sense… Despite not knowing about Stevie and what he did to Ariel under his nose- he was always up anyone’s ass that thought about flirting with her when they talked about girls in the Vault. 

“Yeah.. Heh, I kind of do,” Butch smiled to himself remembering when he was worried about her working with that green micro-stuff he saw her always playing around with and would be right over her shoulder- one time even yelled when he saw the stuff glow, thought it was gonna explode in her face and jumped on her to protect her.  _ God, I’m an idiot.  _

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


“Alright, as I said, don’t separate, stay close, and do not make too much noise. Especially in these parts, the last thing I want to happen is for a horde to show up and we get separated.” Ariel announces as Charon stays at the back to make sure nothing gets behind them, and to make sure no one runs in opposite directions if anything. 

“The docks are downtown, but in order to get there, we have to walk through midtown, all the way around… A lot of buildings were knocked over or sunken because of the bombs and well-- You don’t see anyone working for the union to clean it up,” Jo laughed at that softly, helping Van over some rubble. Butch was in his head the whole time wearily looking around in front of him and in the back of him at the ghoul that was literally accompanying them. In his earnest opinion- he was more worried about the ghoul that was supposed to be watching his back.

“This is feral territory. All conversation stops now,” says Charon, and Ariel nods hearing it get eerily quiet. 

Jo kept Van close to him as they rounded the corner walking past a train station entrance to find the opening in the collapsed buildings to shortcut into the downtown area that Charon and Ariel had found after being chased by Enclave with no other way to go. Idiots with rocket launchers--

Just as they were rounding the corner Butch’s foot got caught on something, some old metal flooring that peeled up and made him trip on it, making a loud bang resonate through the relatively once quiet plaza. Ariel signaled for them all to stop moving, Charon made slow steps around Butch, gun at the ready. That’s when she heard the familiar choking sound and growls that came with ferals- and there was more than one. Looking back at Van she realized there would be no way she could sprint across the plaza and still have enough energy to get up the slope to get through the broken-down building. “Charon.” She didn’t see any openings- a feral already made its way out of a corner and peeked out, Ariel took the shot with her silenced pistol and watched as its body slammed into an old vehicle once its brain collapsed in on itself, Charon gave Ariel a sharp look when she realized that only roused more. But they stayed put about to continue to the shortcut when a feral came out of the woodworks and another followed-- A glowing one. It roared towards the sky and in response, its pack did so as well, more flooding out of spots they never looked. 

“Run.” Ariel says, goosebumps rising from her fingertips as she notices some coming from behind them, “Run!” Ariel knew the tunnels for the most part were cleared, she cleared them with Clover and Charon to help create a way for people to get to the Lincoln Memorial faster and not get eaten to bits by the ferals roaming around. But mole rats would always be in the ground somewhere so it was no shock there was a couple right by the entrance to the trains. “Keep going, towards the steps to the station! Charon!” Charon was lingering by her side as she shot down as many running behind them, sometimes his habits of the contract would kick in- 

Butch was about to turn around and help Ariel when he noticed she wasn’t running side by side with them, but Charon swiped him up and spun him back around. “Keep running kid. Help the woman.” Charon says and that's when he realized Van was struggling to keep up with them, even with Jo helping her. Butch immediately caught up to them and brushed Jo to the side, before finally picking Van up bridal style and ran ahead into the tunnels with Jo shooting any stragglers that got too close. “Kill the glowing one first!” Charon barked and Ariel grunted, “What do you think I’m doing?! Inviting him for tea at my place?” It was a walking health pack for itself and those around it. Making it one of the hardest ferals to kill. “We’ll run out of ammo by the time we kill them, we need to catch up to them--” Charon knew what she was gonna say, but ever since she’d found loopholes in his contract he’d been getting better at not doing everything she says- not that she barks orders at him but it was better this way.

“ **You** go, lead them the way I’ll be right behind you guys!”

After seeing them safely go to the left of Metro Stations main lobby. With a loud whistle, she leads the herd the opposite way, towards Train D’s platform knowing its entrances were collapsed on both sides. If she did this right, all she had to do was ring-around-the-rosy on them and lock them all in.  _ Somehow…. Oh!  _ That’s when she spotted the small family of Raiders that had just moved in--  _ How nice of them to move in!  _

Quickly she moved on her feet, drawing the Raider's attention to her after she ran down the steps with Ferals on her tail. “Hey, boys! Got treats for ya!” Hopping over an occupied mattress she continued running through as many of them as she could, noticing some of them were asleep- Ariel almost felt bad for what she was gonna do till she saw bodies hung over a fire like spit-roasts. Some were small and a few were adult-sized. There wasn’t enough time to process what the people around the fire had done when she heard Ferals taking a bite into one of the brutes she vaulted over. The possible remorse left her as she continued for the stairs, it would’ve been a straight shot to the steps if she hadn’t been tackled to the ground. Glancing at the Feral pack she counted the amount of time it would take for them to reach them.

_ 25 seconds. Move- move- _

Utilizing what she’d learned a few weeks ago she slid her legs up and around the drugged up Raider’s throat and yanked them back down to the ground, where their head made a bang with the hard train floor. After snaking her way out from under their grip that remained even knocked out cold on the pavement they still had their grip lingering on her jacket.  _ Shit!  _ A Feral had noticed the struggle and before she could think of any other way she threw the Raider at the Feral-- Their grip finally let up and allowed her time-room to run towards the other steps that went back up to the lobby. “There she is! Kill her!” It was absolute chaos she ensued and the window she had to get out was shrinking as she fired back at those that tried to stop her from leaving- some either being taken aback by a Feral ghoul or accidentally being shot by their own “friends” that couldn’t aim to save their lives. 

Ariel slammed the terminals gate shut, locking them all in together along with the see-through grate not wishing to take any chances of any of them getting out. Though just as she was, something caught her ankle and her hands made contact with the floor before her face could, and watched as the ceiling vibrated- or was that her head? Not having enough air in her system fucked with her. 

“Fuck!--” The Feral was three seconds away from taking a chunk out of her ankle, but she was faster and sent its brains flying once she could reach for it. 

_ I think… I think I’m gonna just lay here for a little… _

Ariel shut her eyes with a soft yawn and shrugged a little to roll out the tight muscles, the sound of fighting below her was starting to quiet and lulled her a little. But then she abruptly sat up after calmly shutting her eyes. 

_ Wait, I’m an escort today _

She groaned to herself and could feel the tire creep up on her. Unable to sleep after what happened in the Vault- sleep wasn’t something she got a lot of while there.

_ Fuck. _

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


“Ariel!” Said woman shushed him, “Sh! You don’t wanna attract anything-” Butch cut her off, motioning with his hands to follow him. “It’s important, Vanessa started uh- I don’t know- peeing herself? She said she feels sick and-”  _ Oh God.  _

“She’s going into labor Butch- Shit-” Ariel tried to think of what they could possibly use to deliver the child safely in a goddamn Train Station. 

_ Van couldn’t have said she was convulsing at my house?! _

“Look through the bathrooms and try to bring whatever medical supplies that might be in there- also inside the ticket booth- Try anywhere- We wanna have anything and everything ready,” Butch was still processing the part where Vanessa would be giving birth and Ariel had to snap him out of it.

“Come on! We don’t have all day, I need to get the baby out of her!” Butch of course was in shock, but once the jitters left his system he was running out of the room Charon made them hide-out in. Butch was a lot of things and being quite literal was something he did at times, so yanking the medical containers off the walls was one of them as he removed them from their original places and took as many as he could under his arm before running back as fast as he could. He could hear Van groaning in pain as soon as he rounded the corner and spotted Charon keeping watch. 

“Here! I brought as many as I could find, this one looks like it's got the best stuff!” Butch put them all down haphazardly in front of Ariel and she almost scolded him for it till she saw the slight shake in his hands, he did his best to help her open it but mostly let her take the lead and just was seated on his knees holding a hand out for Vanessa to let out her pain on his hands. “I need you to go in a squat position Van-- Joe, help her support herself on the wall behind her,” Joe wasn’t about to question the smartest person he knows and did as he was told, helping Van into a squat while simultaneously tasking Butch with handing the tools she needed to her. The easy stuff like towels for support was fine till Ariel realized she couldn’t exactly have Butch there for the entire process so abruptly she told him to move away and had Joe continue helping her stay in her squat.

“Oh- my go- Get them outta me!” Ariel almost laughed at her urgency but stopped herself, “Joe hold her hands- she might crush them, but don’t worry you’ll be fine,” 

They'd finally gotten the child out, thick black lashes and a swirl of hair on top. 

"It's a girl.." She says while gently wiping it, supporting its head with as much cushion as possible. 

"Oh my god Joey!" Van was exhausted and excited as she looked down at the wrapped-up baby, handing her off to Joe. "We did it, Joe," Vanessa smiled before groaning in pain, feeling more convulsions. "Ariela!" She almost screamed and Ariel was quick to realize what was happening. _Twins?!_

"A boy," He was blonde like his mother, eye color soon to be determined when they both open their eyes for the first time. Thankfully the initial crying they both were doing wasn't too long, the warmth of their parents lulled them to sleep easily and Ariel realized they needed to feed them somehow and when Vanessa said she had baby formula and her breasts she laughed gently. Walking off to Charon who was just scoping the area religiously. 

"You can go sit I'll take over." He shook his head with a grumble.

They stood in silence against the wall and Charon spoke up. 

"I never thought I'd see it again." Ariel looked to him for further details and he continued.

"Babies." Charon continues puffing on his cigarette.

"I haven't seen a Baby since..." He groans forgetting the details, "Since _before_ ," Charon cracks a side-smile, but it fell as quickly as it came. "I had... A daughter," she'd never heard of that part of his story-- memories were only just starting to come back to him. Locked away for as long as he could've known. "Technically she was my niece, I remember now-" He hummed, smiling at the sound of her voice in his head.

"My sister died giving birth and, the father? Unbeknownst to us all. But I knew it was Babayaga-- He was going to have me kill it or sent to early super soldier training like me. So I chose to take her home with me." Charon's eyes shut as if he was remembering along the way.

"They found out I didn't kill her like I was told-- The day the bombs fell."

"I had her in my arms as the world ended." 

Ariel didn't show it but she was softly crying at the simplified story. Wondering more and more about her friend.

She didn't want him to be sad and she wasn't good at consoling either. 

"Did she have a favorite color?" 

Charon snorted and she swore she saw his eyes glistening a little, "Yes. She did." 

"Eris liked silver. Shiny silver." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lmk what u think abt charons lil bit of characterization? i got sum inspiration from cap america and black widow and their stories.


	11. too much running to talk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> flash backs, running, babies, super mutants, talon company and more  
> hand holding 0.0 lul

**_“Would you just listen!”_ **

**_“No. You’re gonna do the fucking listening.”_ **

**_“All I’ve ever done was be Daddy’s girl- Always listening- Always doing as she’s told- This is the last straw!”_ **

**_“This is my life’s work. Your mothers work. I won’t stop at nothing till I finish it.”_ **

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**_“I’m sorry Ariel. Please forgive me?”_ **

**_“At the end of the day I’m still your Father!”_ **

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Waking up for the fifth time that night their exhale stuttered out of her as she looked to the ceiling painted faintly with the small amount of light outside her room leaking through. No matter what she did that sunken feeling was still there, pulling her deeper in the mattress and pushing her lids shut for another restless sleep that would have her up in twenty minutes. 

This is what it was. Since the argument at Vault 112 with her Father  _ and  _ the one they’d had most recently at Rivet City. 

_ Right before he— left me.  _

**_“I will not go back to the Vault Ariel. This isn’t child’s play. Now- I need you to return to the Vault this is no place for you to be-“_ **

**_“Are you even listening Daddy!?” Ariel was the most hysterical Charon had ever seen her._ **

**_“I can’t go back! You left when the Vault was at its weakest- You left without me! You didn’t even take our picture in the living room- you just- you picked up and left me behind!”_ **

**_“You were safer in there than out here! Watch your t—“_ **

**_“I was never safe down there. Not in my own skin. Not ever. You- do you even love me? Did you even miss me while you were out here? Or was I a miscalculation? Dr. Li said that’s how you described my birth.”_ **

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


“It’s time to move.” Charon says taking Ariel out of the pit she’d fallen in while asleep. 

“Right-“ Grabbing the children gently she folded makeshift wraps around the and tied one to Joe’s chest, the other was on Van due to her protests to being capable of carrying the child she’d birthed- but Ariel knew it was possibly because of postpartum anxiety. 

“If it’s too much Vanessa just let me know,” Butch says brushing the babies hair back, “I’ve never seen a cute baby before- honest!” He snorted to himself when Joe rolled his eyes at him as Charon scoped ahead with Ariel who was a trail behind secretly listening. 

“I hope the kids that were usually in the daycare will be alright with you gone,” Joe softly comments as they head toward the entrance they originally came through. 

Dawn was right around the corner and Ariel wanted to get them to the boat before docking or raiders could stop them. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


“You taking the boat over with us?” Butch asks, trailing behind a little to talk to Ariel who had their backs. 

“No, I don’t usually head to Rivet City often.” Butch played with his lips, glancing at her through his lashes and back ahead of them. 

“Not a fan favorite?” 

“No- well- I don’t know,” Ariel audibly sighed shakily and he just nodded his head. 

“I haven’t heard you talk about him in a while, how’s J—“ 

Ariel noticed Charons hand signal and stopped, pulling Butch to take cover with her since Charon had already helped Vanessa and Joe take cover.

“Why’d we sto-“ Loud growling could be heard from behind them, angry and confused. 

“ **We hungry! Where the humans?”** Ariel didn’t like the sound of that. 

_ Who told Super mutants humans are migrating through here? _

_ Unless.. There’s a smart one in the midst.  _

**“Patience. The scouts say they see plentiful of human activity around here. A human should be coming through at any point today.”**

_ A Gen 3 mutant.  _

Ariel clasped a hand over his mouth when Butch continued. “Danger.  _ Shut it!”  _ She whispered into his ear, hand leaving a finger over his lips to emphasize shutting up before releasing him. 

She could hear ones footsteps headed her way and softly had to push Butch in the opposite direction. They needed to hide and fast. 

Fast on his feet he spotted a nook for them, pulling Ariel to her feet with him so fast she almost stumbled, but his hands were faster and pulled her to his chest against the wall behind foliage.

**_“You hear that?”_ **

Ariel gasped upon impact with the wall behind her, and she could see his eyes widen at something that she could see reflected in his eyes and could see a brute supermutant walking past in them. 

Butch could see the big guys head turning towards their direction and noticed more coming round the corner, so he pressed further into the wall forgetting Ariel was there when she yelped in surprise when he’d done it. Instinctively she went to push him away when they heard a babies cries in the distance. 

_ Oh, no.. No, no, no-- _

**_“Baby? A snack!”_ ** One of them said approaching the cries that seemed to double as their stomps got farther away from them.

“I have to--” Butch stopped her from moving out of the nook they were in, shaking his head, “The crying stopped,” He whispered it right into her ear causing her fight or flight to go off again but it was replaced by an intense heat that budded from her chest to her cheeks. “ _ Oh. _ ” She murmured it and saw him smirk as he saw something, “They’re gettin’ away, we just gotta meet' em over there somehow,” he says, finally looking down at Ariel who was staring at him.

“ _ What _ ?” Butch looked at her incredulously and noticed the blush on her cheeks, “Are you gonna get a nose bleed?” She frowned immediately and pushed him away almost immediately, “ _ nosebleed?  _ Ugh.” Ariel rolled her eyes to herself and Butch was trailing behind her with a big question mark hanging over him as they snuck behind them, but then they spum around hearing a voice calling them. 

“Hey! Are you that Vault dweller?” Ariel thought that it was a ‘fan’ but spotting the black combat armor and the white paint on it,  _ Talon Company,  _ “They talkin’ about you?  _ Oh!”  _ Butch ducked his head when they started aiming towards them and almost busted his ass when a shot went off towards them. 

Taking cover he spotted the Super mutants headed their way again and looked around for a way out, it was risky but he was confident they could climb through. Talon company and the mutants were going at it now and tapped her shoulder. “Follow me I got an idea,” Ariel took the chance and followed him through a broken down building and just as she was about to speak her spotted the hole in the ceiling-- he guessed from the layout they’d end up closer to the exit but she wasn’t so sure. 

“Hey, who passed topography with flying colors? Come here,” Ariel whipped her head around hearing a car explode and quickly ran over as lasers and machine guns were popping off. 

“Give me a boost,” 

“A boost? I can’t lift you!” Butch rolled his eyes, “Yes you can, you’re stronger than you look-- Lifting me up is gonna be way harder than pushing me up, come on-” Ariel could hear something approaching them and from the sound of it, it was one of those Super Mutants pets. 

“OK! Your way works-” Leaning against the wall the way he showed her, she pushed with all her might to get him up to the hole and watched him climb up and out. 

“Butch?” Ariel could see it now crawling through the foliage with another by its side, she could always shoot at them with her pistol but it was no use against them- she knew she needed to use two mags to kill them and the factors in this closed space weren't looking up. 

“Butch!”  _ Did he leave me? How could he--! _

“Ari you gotta jump!” He was right, she was too short to just reach his hand sticking through the ceiling above her, with as much height she could get she jumped. Just barely missing his hands, fingertips brushing every time, “I  _ can’t--”  _

Butch leaned himself further down grasping a gate next to him for support, “One more, come on, they’re right behind you!” With a final leap their hands met, and with ease he pulled her up to the ledge. Releasing the gate he had his other hand on he reached down and pulled her in the rest of the way by the waist watching one of the pets tentacles miss her foot by a hair. 

No time to waste he helped her up with him and spotted Charon in the distance by the way out, shooting at some Talon company that spotted him. It was a known fact that she usually ran around with a Ghoul. 

Ariel shot off at a couple that had their backs turned to them, too busy firing at Charon to notice and finally made it through to the other side. Shots still went off in the distance between the Super Mutants and Talon, Van and Joe were worried sick about the babies and Ariel who had stumbled a little down the way. Butch  _ had  _ offered his hand to her, but she ignored it- not wanting him to feel like he was better than her or something of that- not that it mattered to her. 

“Christ- how much more do we have before we get to the boat?” Joe asks as they continued at a brisk pace on the side eyeing the dirty water that looked like it was boiling under the sun. 

Looking at the time on her Pip-boy she gasped, “We need to pick up the pace or you’re gonna miss the first boat there. The next one is at 6’o’clock,” 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Butch stuffed the hand she ignored in his pocket fiddling with toothpick as they neared a docking area. It wasn’t a huge boat but it was definitely one, so there's that for something. He saw the big guy named Charon take a stance next to some table while Ariel went to speak to the ticket vendor.

_ Guess nothing really is free out here.  _

He spotted the sign and the prices expecting to see dollars and cents but to his dismay it was  **caps** .  _ Who the fuck is using bottle caps as money?  _ He thought to himself as he wondered how he could pay Ariel back.  _ Maybe I’ll just walk, save her the money but then-- she brought me all the way here already shit. That’d be ungrateful. _

“Hey Ariel, uh, how am I supposed to pay you back? I don’t have any bottle caps, just real money--” The vendor laughed, his teeth browned with time and beard dirty--  _ Yeesh. Never heard of soap? Oh wait. _

“That ain’t no  _ real  _ mohnay boy, Ha! That’s play mohney we give to de kids,” Butch didn’t care to process the accent, only rolled his eyes as he noticed Ariel trying to bite back a laugh. 

“Thanks Oisin!” 

“No problem lass, and hey! Tell that sweet one in Underworld I been thinkin’ bout her someday, wish I could visit er’ but aye… Money makin’ is really eatin’ my day away,” Oisin said, handing her the tickets. Counting them off in his head he noticed she also paid for the young man. 

“Oi, you ought to pay her back some way. Maybe a good time ha?” He jokes and laughs hysterical at the blush on their faces. “I’m jokin’ with you kids, run along ye!”

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


“So…” Butch walks up to Charon who was taking time to shine off the barrel of his shotgun, “How long have you been uhm, with her?” Charon furrowed his brows when he realized he was trying to address him. Especially like that, “What?” Charon could finally see the silver-like color of the gun shine through and for a second he swore it looked as bright as the old silver coins he had. 

Charon glanced at Ariel for a moment, watching her speak to some travelers who recognized her description, keeping a close side eye on anyone that entered the docks perimeter as the time to leave got closer. 

“I mean like-- What’re you to her?--” Butch followed Charon’s line of sight and could see him looking her way every so often, “What’s it to  _ you _ ?” Charon squinted his eyes at him as he stood up, towering over him by a foot as he gathered his shotgun from the table.

“Nothing--! I just, I just uh--” Butch puffed his cheeks, a nervous whistle escaping him as he still waited for a clear answer. “I wanted to make sure you weren’t dangerous or anything to her--” Charon cringed, twisting around to look at Butch, grabbing him by the collar of his undershirt. 

“Let’s get this straight away.” Butch instinctively went into fight mode but stopped himself when he saw Ariel, smiling so sweetly,  _ without  _ him. It almost always had been that way, how could he forget it?  _ Maybe we don’t belong together, even as friends. _

“You weren’t here for anything she went through this year. And from the way she talked about you?” He chuckled to himself deciding to hold it in.  _ Not my place. Nor is it the time. Ariel is a kid anyway. She doesn’t need this himbo. _

Ariel had given Joe and Vanessa some caps for the road, and the bag she’d been carrying that was meant for them as well. Just the basic necessities and the keys to her home in Rivet City- of course it was hers, but she could never call that place home. Not ever.

Turning to look for Butch she noticed him about to get ripped to shreds by Charon and just as she went to step-in he was released. Charon nodded his head her way and pointed to where he would wait for her when she was done, not before he was thanked by Joe and Vanessa who gave the stiff man a warm hug. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


“What was that?” Ariel asks, instinctively reaching out to adjust the collar of his shirt. But she stopped herself in time. 

“I uh, I don’t think your friend likes me very much,” Butch jokes, rubbing the back of his neck and Ariel smiles in amusement, “Charon doesn’t like anyone much,” Butch’s face turned sour at that and let his thoughts slip out, “He seems to like you very much,” Furrowing her brows she laughed, rolling her eyes at him, “Seriously?” Butch blushed, and hid it by rubbing them like he’d done it from stimulation.

“Yeah?” Ariel crossed her arms over her chest about to say something,  _ Probably gonna sass me or reprimand me-- That don’t sound bad? _

But just as she was about to say something the horn on the boat for all the board went off. 

“Here’s some caps to start you off,” When she handed him a bag of caps he felt like she was handing a weight off to him, and realized what exactly was happening. “Goodb--”

“Hey now wait a second, you don’t at least wanna spend some time over in Rivet City till I-- till Joe and Vanessa settle?” Ariel shook her head, “Nah, they’re basically set. They just need to figure out how to make a living there just like you,” She explains, “You can open up a salon,”

Butch cuts her off, “ **_Barbershop,_ ** I’’m a barber sweetie,” Old Ariel would’ve blushed at the nickname but this wasn’t the case. “Whatever you say Butch,” She snorts remembering a time when she was in the vault, when they were friends- at least in some weird way or form.

“Will you stop by at all?” Ariel ponders on it, hearing the last horn in warning to anyone that they were about to leave. “I--” A grenade went off nearby, the shrapnel hitting the back of her boots. 

“You need to get on board Butch-- Go!” Giving Butch a push she kicked an old school table over for cover and started firing. Charon was still at his post and a few other paid mercenaries that protected the docks from anything that stumbled by threatening them. 

“But-!” Butch wanted to help, he didn’t wanna leave her but he could hear their babies cries and remembered his role. “I’ll protect them I swear!” Rushing on board he spotted a few raiders snuck on, thankfully for him they were melee users and one shot to the body was enough to disable them.  _ Guess her little shooting range was helpful after all.. _

“Get away from me!” A woman exclaimed, Joe was fighting them off to the best of his ability with Vanessa carrying both their children. “Be careful Joe!” With a tackle he sent the Raider flying and punched them in the face till they couldn’t respond anymore. 

Everyone was shaken up on the ship, the armed ones on the ship were already preoccupied. 

_ If I didn’t get on board they would’ve been chopped liver. _

The two mercenaries on board disposed of the Raiders on the lower level, and Butch noticed how far they’d gotten from the dock and could see her fighting along side that--  _ Ghoul _ is what Ariel said they were respectfully called. 

“Thank you Butch- I dunno what could’ve happened if you weren’t here,” Vanessa says, stroking over her unnamed son’s head. They were still undecided on what to name either of them.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


“What about Kenji?” Butch randomly suggests, remembering the name from a book he’d stolen from Ariel-- the memory made him smile gently rubbing his thumb over the corner of it. 

Vanessa actually quite liked the name, repeating it a few times to herself under her breath. 

“For the boy?” He shook his head, “Nah,” Butch pointed at the sleepy girl who’d finally opened her eyes, looking right up at her Father who was holding her. 

“Zyrair…” Ariel said remembering when she’d opened up a little about things, one of them was her Father’s family he talked about so briefly she’d almost forgotten. James had a brother. Who knows if he was alive or not.

“Where’d you get these names?” Joe asks and he smiles sheepishly again avoiding eye contact to look out at the murky water instead.

“ _ Ariel _ .” Joe and Vanessa looked at each other knowingly. They knew that look and that tone. 

“He’s down  **bad** .” Joe whispers to Vanessa and she snorts slapping his shoulder.

“Hopefully she visits us sometime soon after we all settle, she gave us the keys to her home there and-- we were hoping you’d stay with us till you’re steady.” 

Butch was more than appreciative, “Really?” Joe nods his head, kissing the top of Kenji’s head.

  
“ **Really.** ” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lmk what u think abt this chapter and maybe what u hope to see in the next one! we're gonna be tagging along butch and my ocs for a bit so strap in :) ofc ariel will b in the mix in some way or another


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